Gorilla Monsoon – Lee Duigon

CTVA - US TV Listings - 1961

G’Day! Byron the Quokka here, with Quokka University’s TV listings for the weekend. Are you craving something edifying, absorbing, rib-ticklingly hilarious, or butt-scratchingly suspenseful? Me, too. I wonder where you can get it. Meanwhile, there’s this:

4:30 P.M. 02 03 BAKED NEWS (News & Cooking)

Make mint toothpaste cookies with Violet Crepuscular while the world stumbles into one crisis after another. Reporter: Cy Anara Weather: Angela Merkel

05 OPEN END WITH GORILLA MONSOON–PUBLIC AFFAIRS

Join pro wrestling legend Gorilla Monsoon as he interviews this weekend’s prominent news makers. Guests: Andre the Giant, S.D. “Special Delivery” Jones, “Nature Boy” Buddy Rodgers, Ohio Gov. John Kasich, and a newt.

4:48 P.M. 07 BEEN THERE, DONE THAT–TRAVEL

Harvey Yardarm visits Sayreville, New Jersey, and shows slides taken on the campus of Mr. Potato Head Community College.

5 P.M. 02 10 11 MOVIE–TRAGEDY/SUSPENSE

“One for the Money, Two for the Show” (1982) The aging Bowery Boys are in for the scare of their lives when a Soviet spy (Mel Torme) hires the Chinese People’s Army to wipe them out. Leo Gorcey, Huntz Hall. General Hai: Oscar Levant. General Lo: Walter Mondale. Music by F. Lee Baily and his orchestra.

12 13 NEURALGIA PATROL–POLICE

“I’m Sure It’s My Sciatica!” The Health Complaint Squad finds Mr. and Mrs. Muldoon (Clint Eastwood, Linda Hunt) a confusing mix of symptoms, and Dr. Twinkly (Abe Vigoda) is dangerously close to blowing his stack. Special guest star: Carl Yastrzemski as “the Beaver.”

Well, that should be enough to get you started! And this is me high-tailing it out of here before somebody asks me where we got these shows.

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Just to show you that even pro wrestling is more tasteful than our politics, these days, here’s what happened in 1976 when Muhammad Ali, the world heavyweight boxing champion, took on the late Gorilla Monsoon (1937-1999).

Ah, Gorilla Monsoon! He was really Robert James “Gino” Marella from Rochester, New York, former NCAA wrestling star. But he hit it big when they billed him as the savage Gorilla Monsoon from the wilds of Manchuria. One of my high school friends attended a wrestling match at Temple Hall in Highland Park, NJ, and became sort of a kid celebrity when Gorilla Monsoon threw an autograph book right back in his face.

And then, with pro wrestling’s traditional penchant for the incredible, Gorilla Monsoon was transformed into a fan favorite, a gentle giant who had no difficulty at all, speaking English, and an all-around good guy.

The Muhammad Ali dust-up was hype for Ali’s coming bout with Japanese wrestler Antonio Inoki. What a hoot that was. But Gorilla never admitted that his meeting with Ali was scripted in advance. So maybe he did wipe up the mat with the champ–ya think?

My wife and I went to a lot of pro wrestling matches, way back when, and saw all the greats of the era. We don’t go anymore: an awful lot of artless zing, with slob appeal raised to a height that had to be seen to be believed (and enjoyed), has gone out of wrestling since then.

But we do have some memories that still tickle us to this day.