‘Trump Made Us Obese’

Image result for images of happy puppies

It seems that sometime after Election Day 2016, a lot of adult black women mysteriously became obese. Now, thanks to a professor of gender studies at Rutgers Looniversity, we know what made that happen.

Donald Trump! His evil Racist policies made all those women fat (https://www.foxnews.com/politics/trump-policies-racism-may-cause-some-black-womens-weight-problems-professor-says).

The fact that many of them were overweight years before anyone even thought of Trump as a political figure can be explained by a form of unconscious clairvoyance. Subconsciously anticipating that Donald Trump would become president, years and years ahead, their bodies began to adapt to the inevitable “racial stress for people of color” by packing on the pounds.

I went to that stupid university. Wait’ll the next time Rutgers phones to ask for an alumni contribution from me.

It would be unkind to quote directly from this, er, professor’s babblings, or to give her name. Suffice it to say that it is unconscionable for the taxpayers of New Jersey to have to pay this whining gasbag’s salary.

“Higher education”–it’ll kill us if we don’t defund it.