An Honorary Quokka!

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Wow! Look at all those bicycles! Surely nobody would miss just one…

Byron the Quokka here, with excellent news! Meanwhile Lee is outside doing cartwheels (figure of speech: last time he really did a cartwheel, he split his pants) because Patty has fixed his computer.

For this achievement, the faculty at Quokka University has awarded her the designation of Honorary Quokka and appointed her QU’s resident Computer Expert. We realize the “resident” part cannot be taken literally, her living in New Jersey instead of Rottnest Island; but we think we have the communications technology to make it work.

It all goes to show how it pays to marry somebody who”s both smart and determined–smartest thing he ever did.

Now if we can only convince him to offer a bicycle as the prize for the next comment contest, maybe we can pump up the readership to what it used to be.

Update on the Update

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Twenty-four hours after initiating a routine maintenance chore, the computer I normally work with is still out of the saga, hors de combat, non-functional, doesn’t freakin’ work, etc. etc. It is still configuring! Can you say “configuring”? I have no idea what that means in computer lingo; plain English won’t help you out of that labyrinth.

Patty is cautiously optimistic that it’s almost done having a breakdown or whatever else you call it when you approve an update and the whole thing turns into Nadler. Well, that would be wonderful indeed if she were right. Then I could go back to trying to get my Share button back.

I’d like to put up a couple more posts today; but I’d also like to go outside and have a cigar before it starts to rain.

Meanwhile, we can all be thankful that no one is serious about basing public policy on computer models. Especially just before an update.

The Update: a Horror Story

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Well, now what do I do?

The computer sez “install new updated version of Firefox.” I didn’t dare try, but Patty did. That was an hour ago. It still doesn’t work. It just sits there “configuring.” It’ll only take a few minutes, she said.

Meanwhile, viewership has imploded and today is shaping up as a right proper rotter. Where did everybody go? Was it something I said? I wonder if other bloggers have experienced this lately.

Yes, I’m typing this on another computer. We have two. The one I use has stopped working. What a great update. As Pyrrhus once said, “Another such victory and I am undone.” I don’t have a victory, but I love using classical quotes. It keeps me from cursing.

So now I guess I’ll go back outside and try to read this big thick book with really small print that I have to review for Chalcedon. It’s all about postmodernism. After that I guess I’ll scream for a while.

Now I Have No Facebook at All

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What are they trying to do to me?

This morning I have no Facebook connection at all. When I try to reconnect, WordPress tells me it’s “not allowed.” What?

Is this all to force me to use their shiny new “block editing”? Well, I can’t use it! And I don’t want to use it! I’m here to write, not sod around with computers.

WordPress acts more like an adversary than the provider of a service. But of course if I leave I’ll lost an archive numbering thousands of posts.

No wonder I’m down 120 views a day.

P.S.–Jill has found other Facebook buttons I can use, so at least I can go back to sharing my blog posts on my wife’s Facebook page. The only drawback is that the new buttons don’t tell me how many readers have shared the post. Maybe it’s a WordPress glitch that’ll go away. I don’t know.

Can You Share My Posts Now?

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Ragnar the Happy Puppy, once a business associate of Byron the Quokka, has found that the “301 Whatsit Permanently Moved” message that used to scuttle my Facebook posts is now gone as mysteriously as it came; and also the little “share” buttons now have numbers in them again (WordPress blames that glitch on Facebook).

I would like to know, now, if my readers are able to share my posts with others on Facebook. I’m sure some of you have given up trying.  But the only way I’ll know if it’s working is for readers to share my posts. The more it gets shared, the higher the little number in the button. Sorry, but that’s about as hi-tech as my language gets.

For that matter, yes, I do know that many of us have learned to despise Facebook, and for good reason. But for the time being, that’s what I have and that’s what I must use.

Meanwhile, I’m short 100 views a day, or more–still haven’t solved that mystery. But if a bunch of you each share two or three posts, at least I’ll know it.

P.S.–Since I wrote this, all the little numbers in the blue buttons have disappeared again. You could just scream.

Meanwhile, Re-Farmer has reported that she was able to share my posts on Facebook if she visited the blog through Google Chrome instead of Firefox.

So you might want to try that.

To My Fellow Christian Bloggers

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I have for years enjoyed sharing, with my readers, posts by other Christian bloggers. It pleased me to think I was widening their audience, and you all seemed very happy about it.

But now I can’t share your posts, and it’s not my fault.

First WordPress took away my Reblog function. Something about “you’re on a business plan, you’re not allowed reblog.” Then I discovered the “Share” button, that little symbol that looks like this >, and as long as I was sharing Christian posts that appeared on my Reader, it was just as good as a reblog.

But yesterday I was told I don’t have “Share” anymore–because the hoozit isn’t shebangled with the booscus and a hay-na-nonny and a ha-cha-cha. Oh, they’d let me have “Share” if I used their brand-new totally-impossible-to-understand “Block Editor.” I’ve seen it. I couldn’t use that if my life depended on it.

I have tried to explain to the WP Happiness Engineers. “This is your technology, not mine. I am just a passenger–and you don’t ask the passenger to come out of the plane and do maintenance on the jet engine. You need to be more user-friendly!” They say they’ll see what they can do, to allow me to Share even if I’m using the standard editing format that I’ve used for years. Betcha if their boss told them to find a way or else, they’d find one. But I’ll be very much surprised if they actually solve my problem for me.

So, guys, that’s why I’m not sharing your posts anymore: I want to, but I can’t. They won’t let me.

All I can do is keep pestering WordPress about it.

Is Our Facebook Back to Work?

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It looks like that nagging “301 Moved Permanently” message has been removed and no longer blocks you from sharing our Facebook posts. (If you hadn’t noticed, the posts go up in Patty’s Facebook page.)

The only way I can be sure is if some of you try to share today’s FB posts, or yesterday’s, and then let me know whether you were able to do it.

Meanwhile, I heard from WordPress yesterday that the loss of my “Share” function is a bug at their end and they’re trying to fix it. It’s their technology, they ought to be able to fix it without too much trouble. Unless their technology has been added to, taken from, and played with to the point where they themselves don’t understand it anymore.

So try sharing a post or two, please, and let me know how you make out.


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I’ve just squandered 45 minutes of my time on earth chatting with the WordPress happiness engineer, trying to get my Share button to work, which it suddenly stopped doing this past Sunday. For no reason.

I’ve got a real feel for this now. You get a problem, you can’t fix it, you go to the happiness engineer, and an hour or two later, they tell you there’s nothing they can do–you’ll just have to work it out yourself with plugins, settings, and code, etc.–and jars and jars of green and gooshy gopher guts.

In vain do I protest that I don’t speak computer lingo, I don’t know what they’re talking about. I do history, I do literature, I do politics, I do fantasy: I do not do settings and plugins. I mean, it’s their flamin’ technology! Why can’t they fix it when it goes wrong? I mean, come on, I’m just a passenger! I shouldn’t have to get out and repair the jet engine. What kind of service is that? What are we paying for?

You’d think they could make their own Share button work. “It’s a browser issue, nothin’ to do with us!” Yeah, that’s what they always say.


But I Don’t Love This

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They took away my Reblog function, but I still try, honest. I tried again today. As far as my colleague at the Unashamed of Jesus blog knows, I successfully reblogged his post and he thanked me for it. But no sign of his post has appeared on my page. Sheesh, I don’t want people thinking that I’m only pretending to reblog them!

And now my Share button doesn’t work, either. It stopped working on Sunday. My tech support, Jill, can’t figure out what’s gone wrong. If it stumps her, it’s really wrong. I could go back to the WordPress Happiness Engineers, but they’ll just string me along for an hour and a half and the problem won’t get fixed. But I will get an earful of unintelligible computer-speak. This I don’t need.

Maybe they have a problem that they’re not admitting, and they’ll fix it someday, and the Share button will start working again. That would be nice.

But for the time being… oh, fap!

More WordPress Woes

If I didn’t have supreme confidence in my own unimportance, I’d swear WordPress was out to get me.

Yesterday it was the ol’ “Make his connection to Facebook go away” trick; and try as I might, I couldn’t get it back. Now you see it, now you don’t. I called up Jill and she couldn’t get it back, either. “Have you posted anything they might want to censor?” she asked. Not to my knowledge. Besides, by then we had a video of babies and puppies, and who would censor that? (Is that one of those questions that you shouldn’t ask?)

Well, we tried this and we tried that. And suddenly the post that didn’t have a Facebook share button had one; but the post that had one a moment ago now didn’t. “It looks like some kind of glitch at their end,” Jill theorized. “It might be gone by tomorrow.”

Voila, it’s gone. Of course, I haven’t tried to post this yet, so who knows what will happen? I’m starting to feel like those hamsters on the wheel up there.

Here we go, let’s see what comes out…