Byron’s TV Listings, May 8 2021 REPRINT

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G’day! Byron the Quokka here, with another weekend’s worth of spectacular TV brought to you by Quokka University. Just don’t ask us where we get it!

Without any further ado–we’re just about out of ado, anyhow–here’s a sample.

8:06 A.M.  Ch. 2  GUMBY’S STOCK MARKET TIPS

You won’t get rich, but you might get entertained. What the heck, it’s only money. Let Gumby and Poky show you how to invest it.

8:08   Ch. 3   WANTED FOR FRAUD: GUMBY

Anyone with information leading to the arrest and conviction of Gumby, please contact the Channel 3 Fraud Squad. $15 reward!

8:15   Ch. 5   CROCKED NEWSTALK–News and Commentary

You have to be noticeably intoxicated before they let you join this panel. Tonight’s celebrity drunkard: Big-game hunter Hap “Oops!” Chandler. Tonight’s topic: “String Theory: Who ****ing Gives a ****?” With Xi Jin Ping and his orchestra.

9 A.M.  Ch. 12   MOVIE–Waste of time

“Hamlet Prince of Denmark, Michigan” (2002)  Re-adaptation of Shakespeare’s Hamlet in modern dress and setting, with Hamlet as the son trying to inherit a shoe store after his father is murdered by Brownies. Hamlet: Alec Guinness. Father’s Ghost: Ben Dover. Ophelia: Zsa Zsa Gabor. Polonius: the Bowery Boys. With Henny Youngman’s Joke Machine.

Ch. 32   MY MOTHER THE GUNSLINGER–Western

While a rogue shark picks off Dodge City’s innocent swimmers, Sheriff Flimsy (John Gielgud) must ask Ma (Shari Lewis) to buckle on her guns again to deal with a mysterious stranger who shoots everybody. Dusty the Dog: James Whitmore. Sid the Horse: Alva Toffler  Mary Ellen the Beetle: Linda Hunt.

Well, there you have it–just a taste of what awaits you when you tune into Quokka UTV.

Was Has Got “a” New Idle!!!!!

How to make play dough faces - Kidspot

See “that” pixture?? That thare is Our Deen Of Play-Doh and she “is” Shoing us the Faice “of” our noo Idle for us “to” warship Heer At Collidge!!!! It is the Idle of King Vyris!!! and evry boddy thay Has To baow daown “to” It!!!! Becose King Vyris he is goingto help Demmacratts whin al “The” Elexions fromb naow On!!!!!

It “is” impotent to Rememembar “that” this heer It Is Not Relijjin!!!!!! We “are” Interllecturals and we doughnt Beleave “in anny” Relijjin!!!! That is jist foar De-Ploarabbles!!!! and Bitter Clingers jist lyke Pressadint Obumma he sayed!!!!!!! But King Vyrus,, oncet we Set himb Up on Kampas,, he whil Anser Our Prares!!!!!! This heer it “is” cumpleatlee Diffrint fromb Relijjin!!

We “are” goingto Stop awl “the” Haters we are goingto Fix Themb but goood!!!!! Thay are awl goingto catch the Vyris and dye!!!!!!!!!! That is becose The Vyris it willl knot maik Peple Sic iff that are Woke and dooing Riots and otther Socile Jutstus stuph!!!!! It whil ownly kil yiu iff yiu “Are” a Whyte Privlij Biggit!!

And aslo we has toettle cumpleat Freeedim “Of” Relijjin heer at Collidge,, so anny one whoo woont warship King Vyris thay whil be kiccked Out of Collidge!!!!! We doo that to Cree-ate Divercity!!

I hoap we has enuff Play-Doh to maik A Grate Big Idle of King Vyris!!!

REPRINT Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part I Jan 14, 2011

Movie Review by Lee Duigon

It’s hard to review a piece of a movie-which, for all its nearly three-hour length, is what this is. If you haven’t seen the earlier Harry Potter movies, or read the books, watching this movie will be like entering a roomful of strangers all talking about people and incidents you have never heard of. There’s no flashing back to make things clear, no explanations provided for anything. If you’re not a Harry Potter fan, you can forget about understanding this film.

So why review it, then?

J. K. Rowling’s Harry Potter novels have sold millions and millions of copies, and millions of movie tickets, too. This is the most successful series of books ever published, and it has revolutionized young readers’ fiction. It would be irresponsible to ignore it.

Because Harry Potter is such a cultural phenomenon, and this movie is a slice of it, we can look at it to see what it can tell us about our culture. What has Harry Potter taken out of our culture, and what has it put in?

Magic and Science

In the alternative universe of Harry Potter, everything important gets done by magic-or “wizarding,” as they sometimes call it. Witches, wizards, and warlocks are the elite of that world.

As a thought experiment, plug in “science” for “magic”-and you’ll see that the Harry Potter world pretty closely approximates our own. By “science” we mean what Jean-Marc Berthoud calls “the cultural domination of our whole culture by a purely mathematical model of the universe (the so-called scientific worldview, valid in fact only in its strictly limited domain, that of the measurable) as normative of every aspect of reality.”1

Materialistic “science” in our culture has excluded God. In Harry Potter-land, “magic” does the same. Given the awesome power of magic in that world, there would appear to be no place for God.

Despite various efforts to spin the Potter books as some obscure kind of Christian enterprise, we see no evidence at all in Deathly Hallows I that there is any Christianity at work in any of the characters’ lives, or any other recognizable religion, for that matter. Yes, there is one brief scene in which we see a village church with people inside it singing Christmas carols. What of it? Millions of Americans celebrate Christmas as a generic holiday and are dead to its religious significance. And every now and then, a character in the movie says, “my God.” But that doesn’t mean that they believe in God. For millions of Americans, “God” and even “Jesus” are just words to be tossed casually into a sentence, stripped of all meaning.

J. K. Rowling has been accused of promoting witchcraft. But I think it important to note that in Deathly Hallows I, there is no hint of any power higher than that of the magician. Paganism is supposed to feature pagan gods and goddesses, but we see no gods here. The world of Harry Potter much more closely resembles the fantasy world of The Humanist Manifesto II than it does anything in paganism. Take the Humanist Manifesto and substitute “magic” or “wizarding” for words like “science” and “technology,” and you will instantly find yourself in Harry Potter’s universe.2

Thus we discover that Rowling is not promoting paganism. Wittingly or not, she is promoting humanism.

Dogs Just Wanna Have Fun from from 12/2017

If a dog (or cat) can’t cheer you up, you’re pretty far gone.

I don’t know why, but most of the dogs in this video are into jumping, mostly on top of each other at inopportune moments. My favorite is the little fellow on the trampoline.

The Silver Goddess from 2010

(Originally published in 2006 by The Chalcedon Foundation)

“I inhaled deeply the earthy scent of incense … From the basket of rosaries I took into my hand a strand of vibrantly-colored beads with a silver goddess icon in place of the traditional cross … Once gathered, we began to recite together the ‘Our Mother’ and ‘Hail Goddess’ prayers … some rang bells or sounded the Tibetan bowls.”

The above is a description of a worship service at the Ebenezer Lutheran Church, San Francisco, excerpted from an article on the church’s website (“Experiencing the Goddess Rosary” by Dalyn Cook, http://www.herchurch.org/id8.html). It comes with a picture of a “goddess rosary,” showing the stylized figurine of a nude, pot-bellied “goddess.”

Let it serve as the symbol of a neo-pagan movement that is corrupting America’s mainline Protestant churches — and spilling over into unexpected places.

Posted before–but good again