Four Movies for Fun

Night Tide (1961) - IMDb

I can’t help it: I love movies that don’t have a prayer of being true. I love monster movies. I get a kick out of a good ghost story. And somehow these movies always seem at their best in the fall.

Here are four of my favorite films along these lines, all of them available somewhere on the Internet. Try Youtube first, then amazon. These are sure to brighten any October weekend.

*Night Tide, starring a brand-new Dennis Hopper. How often do you get to see a scary movie about a mermaid? Despite American International’s trademark cheesy special effects, this movie does contain moments of real eeriness and beguiling fantasy. You’ll be surprised by how un-awful it is.

*The Crawling Eye. A monster movie set in the Swiss Alps–how cool is that? I once nagged my wife to watching it with me–in truth, she hates monster movies–and she had to admit it wasn’t bad. (As you can see, I have set the bar a little low. But “not that bad” is a real achievement for most of these films.) Hey, the crawling eye creeping out of the icy fog–ooooh! That’s scary, boys and girls!

*Zacherley’s Horrible Horror–here we leave “not that bad” behind and plunge into the world of “oh, good grief!” Zacherley, who was surely the greatest horror movie host ever, has assembled a dazzling array of trailers for hopelessly bad films, interrupted by his own weird humor. You don’t want to miss The Alligator People!

*The Uninvited–I’ll throw in a genuinely good one, just to show you my heart’s in the right place–not in a jar on Robert Bloch’s desk. Starring Ray Milland, The Uninvited is one of the all-time best ghost movies, and seasoned with enough humor to keep you from hiding under the sheets. It’s got everything–and all without a second of gore, profanity, or fornication.

Well, there you have it–four October movie treats. Let me know how you like ’em.

‘5 Films to Flush Your Brain'(2013)

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With unforgettable special effects!

I like schlocky horror movies. I admit it. They take my mind off the nooze.

5 Films to Flush Your Brain

Here are five films that might have been created especially for this time. Most of them involve monsters. You can say that about the House of Representatives, too.

I should have added Werewolf of Washington. It’s about a monster imitating a human being. As we’ve suspected all along…

 

Where Did Everybody Go?

Not much action here, throughout the afternoon.

Well, maybe I need some other material. Like Sinbad and the Roc, for instance. I just love the music by Bernard Herrmann, and the stop-motion monster by Ray Harryhausen. The clip is from The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad, vintage 1958. Heh-heh, this’ll fetch ’em!

‘Godzilla vs. Megalon’ (Hooray!)

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Yo! Next time you go on a picnic, be sure to take along a hand-held rocket launcher. It just might come in handy.

Here at Chez Leester, the cinematic classic, Godzilla vs. Megalon, is a day-after-Thanksgiving tradition, going back almost 40 years. What other movie can offer such a wealth of totally inexplicable situations? Like, the two guys in the garbage truck beat up and throw off a cliff the bad guy who was going to pay them for a job–and then go ahead and do the job anyway. What other movie screenplay can confidently state that the statues on Easter Island are 3 million years old?

But I don’t want to spoil it for you, just in case you decide to watch it, too.

Pure, unadulterated, totally cool silliness–try and beat that, Serious Mainstream Art Films!

‘Attack of the Crab Monsters’

I cannot understand my wife’s total lack of interest in such cinematic treasures as Attack of the Crab Monsters. She must be a racist. This 1957 gem of a movie accurately portrays what must be done in the event that giant crabs try to take over the world. We have been warned!

Movie Review, ‘The Crawling Eye’

Are you a movie snob? If not, here’s a 1950s monster movie just right for a snowy afternoon.

The Crawling Eye (1958) stars Forrest Tucker and Janet Munro. It’s set in the Swiss Alps and involves–well, I wouldn’t want to spoil it for you.

Unlike most monster movies of this era, The Crawling Eye features very nice cinematography, all-around decent acting, a pace that’s just right, and suspenseful writing. My wife thought it was going to be another one of my stinkers, but had to admit she was wrong. If you’re not looking for Deep Hidden Meanings and feminist angst, and all that other stuff, this film’ll suit you down to the ground.

Show this to your arty friends to annoy them.

Christmas and Kong

OK, I’m late today: couldn’t help it. I had to take down my Christmas tree, it took me all morning, and I’m tired. And I already miss it almost as much as my cats do.

Furthermore, for the sake of my sanity, I just have to take a day off writing about culture rot–which will continue at its frenetic pace whether I report on it or not. Someday, I pray, the people will wise up to what their ruling class is doing to them.

So, instead, I will briefly review one of the nice movies that I got for Christmas–Son of Kong, the fine sequel to King Kong, made the same year with the same sets, same director, same Willis O’Brien special effects, and most of the same cast.

Son of Kong is the only movie I know that deals with the aftermath of letting a monster loose to wreak havoc on a city. Carl Denham (played by the wonderful Robert Armstrong) is in a heap of trouble for bringing King Kong to New York City. In addition to lawsuits galore, he’s about to be indicted by a grand jury. Skipper Englehorn, whose ship brought King Kong to the city, figures he’s next. So when he suggests to Denham that they hop back aboard the ship and skip town, he doesn’t have to ask twice.

After bumming around the armpits of the China Sea, Denham and the Skipper return to Skull Island, Kong’s island, in search of a treasure that they hadn’t known about, the first time. A young woman accompanies them as a stowaway. (For some reason, Fay Wray didn’t want to go back to Kong’s island. Go figure.) Anyhow, they find the treasure, and something else–King Kong’s offspring. We are not given any information as to the whereabouts of Queen Kong; but Junior is friendly, and he saves the lives of Denham and the girl when they’re attacked by a giant cave bear. Meanwhile, the Skipper and the Chinese cook, Charlie, are attacked by a Styracosaurus–another one of O’Brien’s marvelous creations.Note that Willis O’Brien, decades ahead of the scientists, depicted dinosaurs as active, fast-moving creatures. If this Styracosaurus had ever run into the Tyrannosaurus from the original King Kong, there would have been a battle royal.

I won’t spoil the story by saying any more about it. I originally saw this gem of a movie on TV, on Million Dollar Movie (“If you missed any part of Son of Kong, or wish to see it again, the next showing is at such-and- such a time”:–remember that?), and my friends and I couldn’t wait to trot out our toys and re-enact the movie, using my chess set to simulate the treasure.

Hey, have some fun–see if you can find this film on youtube, or spring for a few bucks and order it from amazon.com.