Okay, here it is, the satire that I promised you. Welcome to Commieland!
See? Right there in the opening sentence, I spilled the beans. But I know that some people are going to believe it anyhow. I did try to make it as ridiculous as I could, while still maintaining a tenuous grasp on reality. But the nooze these days is so spectacularly awful, calling a theme park Commieland seems like something any public school board would be only too happy to do.
Oh–and have the FBI “investigate” us if we complain!