Thancks-Giving it shood “Not” be aloud no moar!!!!!
Heer “at” the Stoodint Soviet we has cumpozed a Ee-male and sended It to awl “the” famblies arowned The Collidge to oardur themb “to” Dee-Collinize thare stopid Thancks-Giving dinnor!!! Becose Thancks-Giving it “is” No-Good stinkin holladay that’s awl abuote Shooting Peeple Of Culler!!!!!
Wen the Pillgrimbs thay kame heer fromb Itally or sombplaice thay shooted awl the Indains who come heer Fromb Indier!!!!!! Then thay starrtid Capatolizm!!!! and aslo brung in Religgin!!!! Thay rooned evry-Thing!!!!!!!!!!
So we sayed In our Ee-male “”Haow dair yiu cellarbrate this Badness!?!? Yiu are jist No-Good durty Capatolist Collownolists!!””! We “are” Glaad we done it becose we fouwned Out that awl the skools in Warshingtin DeC thay done “it” too! And thay has got a Equitty Teemb to teech famblies how To Be Mizrable on Thancks-Giving insted “of” hapy!!!!! We shood has “one Of” thoase too!!!
And we thanck Jobydin the Pressadint for maiking this stopid holladay Cost “so” mutch!!! We woont be hapy “un-till” al themb famblies Thay “are” Un-Hapy!!!!!
Becose “thats” Socile Jutstus!!!!!!!!!
I really should’ve posted this yesterday, for Thanksgiving–how did I forget?
Well, no use crying about it. So today we have Come, Ye Thankful People, Come, played by our friends and esteemed colleagues, Joshua and Jeremy.
Requested by Susan, Thanksgiving Prayer by Johnny Cash.
And I’m grateful to the Lord for giving me Susan as my editor, and for giving me work with Chalcedon’s ministry.
Our family used to get together for Thanksgiving feasts. Now we don’t. Most of us have died. The rest have moved too far away to be visited by any of the others.
Oh, I miss them! And yet in a real sense, they’re still here. Still together.
I do wish I could have persuaded my family members not to move so far away. But we were all younger when they did it, and of course no one anticipated getting old and not being up to four hours on the Parkway anymore.
But love does not get old.
It wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without this hymn. I know I’ve been singing it, and hearing it sung, for every Thanksgiving for as long as I can remember.
We Gather Together–performed by the Sanctuary Choir at the First United Methodist Church in Houston, Texas.
Thanksgiving is tomorrow. Just at this moment, I’m thankful for the sunshine glinting off the few golden leaves left on the maple tree outside my window.
Now Thank We All Our God–by the choir and orchestra at First Plymouth Church in Lincoln, Nebraska.
I jist soddenly fownded ouat “That” tamorro it “Is” Thancks-Giving!! it is a Very Bad Day infented “by” Wyte Struprembacysts!!!!!!!!!! and it shood not be aloud!!
So we hadded a Merjintsy Meting of “the” Stoodent Soviet to Ban Thancks-Giving heer at Collidge!!!! and the voat was 17-1 but we kicked that one Voat owt of the Soviet and then we Beet himb Up!!!!!!
Enny boddy whoo Gets cawt eeting Terky tamorro thay wil get a F! and has to go “To” Censortivity Traning!!!!! and iff thay are Wyte then thay has to go Twicet “and” thay cant be Wyte enny moar!!! Our gole is a 110 Persent% Non-Wyte Kampiss!!!!!!
Insted of Thancks-Giving tamorrow we “are” goingto Cellarbrate a noo hollerday it is cawled “T”hancks Foar Nothing!”!” Day!! and evry boddy heer thay has to Cellarbrate “oar Elss!””” Yiu cant has Dyvercity unlest evry boddy thay al do and Thinck and Say “the” saim Thing “At” tHe Saim Tymbe!!!!
p.s..–I jist heered “that” Jobydin he is comming heer tamorrow to maik a Speach abuot Hapy Eester!!!! He is The Smartist “Man” In The Whorld!!!!!!!!