Nhaow the Trooth it comes Out!!! Syints it “is” Wyte Strupremmasy in Disskies!+!! And that is “The” reezin I fluncted Kemmistry!!!!!!
Yiu doughnt beleave me??? Well, jist loook “at” that Pixture!!!! That there, it is a Wite gye!!!!!!! It Is a Wyte gye dooing kemmastry!! and thay aslo doo Fizzix tooo!!!!Evry ware yiu look is Wyte Superpremmasy!!!!
Heer “at” “the” Stoodint Soviet,, we has de-sided to Do Sumbthing abuout It!!! We voated to get ridd “of awl” the Syints at This here Yoonavarsitty untill we can has Queer Black Femmanist Syints and “no” Other kyned!!!
And aslo we Are goingto ficks that thare Peeriotic Tabel so it woont “has”no moar Wyte Ellamints!!! Jist Black ones lyke Carbin and that stuph thay put In Penssals!!!!!! This it “Is” Very Good becose it maiks tha Tabel mutch shoarter!!!!! (We Can aslo has Chalklit becose It is a nother Braown Ellamint!)
Fromb naow On we whil Not alouw The Collidge to teetch Any Thing Wyte!!!!!! And we Are aslo whirking On “getting Ridd” of Wyte Payper tooo!!!
I can’t believe I paid good money and spent four years getting a degree from this place. Of course, that was a long time ago and it was less in-your-face stupid than it is now.
As Rutgers Rots
This was in 2019 when Rutgers was offering all these “strategies of resistance” pseudo-courses… because we had a Republican president!
Have you noticed how most of this “resistance” simply dries up and blows away as soon as we get some Democrat pinhead in the White House?
Have they thought of filling the seats with dummies? Or would that simply be redundant?
The pro-choice crowd wants to make everybody’s choices for them. At Bucknell Looniversity, for instance, they wanted to make attendance mandatory at a virtue signalfest… because if they didn’t force their fellow students to go, they couldn’t fill the auditorium.
Student Nitwits Want Mandatory Attendance at ‘Social Justice Event’
At great cost, college teaches you how to be stupid. It teaches brainless conformity. And those are its less questionable achievements.
[If you’re playing “Twisted Titles,” you can change Joe Collidge to Joe Coolidge and maybe come up with a future president.]
Heer at The Stoodint Soviet we has “sallootid” Harverd Med Skool!!! Thay “Are” goingto teech “afurming cair” to “Ethicle Non Monoggamy”!”! Its abuot Tyme sumb boddy thay thinked “of” This!!!!
Wen it combs to Secks, yiu naim it, itts Good!! Even BDSM,, witch meens “”Bondige, Domanation, and Saydo Massakissm”!”!”!! Haow grate is That!?? Yiu naim it, thay whil Afurm It!!!
We hoap this heer it whil leed To “a” Secks Eddacation Expolosion!!!!! The Tyme it has coome foar a Noo Secksile Revvalusion!!!! Awl Secks awl “the” tyme Foar Evvry One!! Thare whil be No Sutch Thing “as” Rong Secks ennymoar!!!! This it has got my Moth Antenners spinnning Whith Ecksytmint!!!! And aslo Eckstacy!!
We “Are” goingto Voat foar “a” New Rool that says yiu Cant Graddurate unlest yiu Has don at leest Fyve (5%&) kyneds Of Secks!!!! Awl diffrint kyneds!! This heer It whil grately maik sirius Progrest in acheeving Socile Jutstus!!!!!!!!
Norway quaffs the Kool-Aid
I wish I could say this is a satire, but it isn’t.
Norway’s University of Bergen has spent over $1 million to find out if white paint is… “racist” (https://nypost.com/2023/01/20/norway-funds-research-to-find-out-if-white-paint-is-racist/). Actually, it sounds like they’ve already made up their minds and are only “doing research” to spend the money before someone takes it back.
White paint, says one of the jidrools in charge of this caper, helped “contribute to white supremacy” and [trumpet fanfare, please] has “planetary consequences.”
Babble, babble, babble.
Has Western civilization become too stupid to survive?
Oh, “man”!”! We has jist fowned Out “that” coughffee “it” cawzes Climbit Chainge!!!! So we cauled a Merjintsy Meting “of The” Stoodint Soviet to de-mannd thay Ban Coughffee heer “At” collidge!!!!
We whur goingto voat “To” Ban Evvrything!!! but desiddid Not To Doo That becoze thenn Pot it wood “get bannned” and wee has Nutthing Left “to” Live Foar!!!!!! Suure glad we duckked That Bullit!!! So insted we jist bannned Coughffee!!
I knowed coughffee it Is Racist,, but i diddn Know “it is aslo” maiking the Climbit Chainge!! So fromb nhow On, ownly Spacial Heumin Beans lyke Johhn Kery shood be aloud “to”” Drinck It!!!!! We diddn Know That till this heer gye At Daavos he sayed so!!!!!! He aslo sayed We shood Eat Bugs and i tryed “It” oncet butt it hadd awl themb Legs kickkin and scrachin At Oncet and it got reely icky wen i chooed It!!!!!! Mayby a centerpeed it “whas” the rong kyned Of Bug!!!!
We voated yumannamus to Ban Coughffee and enny boddy whoo trys “to Drinck It” nhow,, thay whil Be Sari!!!!!
Maybe she ought to invest in an almanac.
Time Magazine in 2012 called her “one of the 100 most influential people in the world.”
She’s had her own TV show, comedy gigs, publications… and she’s only 47 years old.
Her name is Chelsea Handler, and I never heard of her.
Well, she recently told America that she didn’t know, until she was 40, that the sun and the moon are NOT the same thing (https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/chelsea-handler-didnt-know-sun-031508207.html). She said she thought the sun set and then “popped back up” as the moon. Like a pop-tart in a toaster.
The Yahoo! article assumes you know who Chelsea Handler is. Well, guys, you assumed wrong.
I mean, really–imagine being “influenced” by someone that ignorant. Doesn’t know the sun is not the moon. I wonder what else she doesn’t know. Betcha she’s way cool with Climate Change and Transgender. What intellectual resources does she have with which to resist?
Ms. Handler is a product of the costliest and most intrusive education system in all of human history.
This “is” waht she whil Look Lyke wen she is finnish!!!
We has jist fowned out that Hillery she “has” bin maide A Pressadintchul Fellow at Cowlumbier Yunavarsitty!!!! Isnt “that” Grate??!
A lott of Trans wimmins thay are now Fellows insted “Of” Gals or Laydies!! Nhow Hillery she “is” a fellow tooo!!!!!!!! She whil ware reggalur Pants and Not jist Pants Soots!!! And aslo I herd she is “goingto” gro a Beerd!!!!!!!
Well this heer it Is How Collidge it chainges yiu!!!! Thats haow i got theeze heer Moth Antenners on my hed!! Themb hoarmoan Shots thay reely whork!! alltho thay diddnt tern me Into “a” wimmin!!!
Nhow “that” Hillery she has did it,, Evry Boddy thay shood awt to do it tooo!!!!! and woodnt It be Grate if Bill Clintin he chainged ginder tooo!!?? and aslo Chellsee!! Iff evry man becumbs a wimmin and Evry wimmin she becumbs a man, then we wood has Troo Socile Jutstus!!!!!!! Amairicka it whil be a Parracide!!!! Mayby i shood Get moar “of” thoze hoarmoan Shotts!! Iff she Can Be a fellow then i Can “Be” a wimmin!!!!!!
([ Woops i maid “a” misteak, it shood be “pestilential fellow” and not the othe!r. I jist spelt it rong!!)]
In 1972 I insisted on defending a friend at a “hearing” (LOL–no official status whatsoever!) before the Michigan State People’s Revolutionary Tribunal (self-appointed, self-defined). A former bottle-throwing radical, he’d Betrayed The Revolution by starting a small business. Everybody knows true radicals never sink so low as to earn a living! No! Until some stupid college hires them, they live off daddy and mommy.
Now I was myself only a year out of college, and it would take me decades to outgrow it. But this Marxist play-acting was just too much.
“Where I come from, out East in New Jersey, people like you just get laughed at,” I told them. (How I wish that were true! But I didn’t know any better.) “We gave up tribunals years ago. We don’t talk like you do anymore, either. You’re just college kids who’ll never stop being college kids.”
They were not used to anybody standing up to them. I said to my friend, “Come on, up you go, we’re getting out of here. This is just a lot of crap. You don’t want to spend any more time with these idiots.” They couldn’t believe their ears.
I wonder if they’ve gotten any better at it. They’ve had, like, 50 years to refine their technique. I’d certainly say the looniversities are way Farther Left than they were in 1972–and they were bad enough, then.
If they only had the power, they’d be carting us off to the guillotine.
Are you still okay with having Democrats in charge?
I refuse to publish the picture that goes with this… nooze. Here’s a nice tree frog instead.
One more nooze article, this one, and then I’m done for the year. Let 2022 blow one last fart.
Time Magazine has picked up on an associate professor of history’s blather about “The White Supremacist Origins of Exercise” (https://nypost.com/2022/12/30/time-magazine-roasted-for-article-suggesting-exercise-has-racist-origins/). This moron “teaches” at The New School in New York City.
Yesterday it was Sean Penn looking like a homeless wino. Today it’s this unsightly character from The New School. (No, I will not post that picture.) I’m beginning to wonder if spiritual pollution eventually manifests itself physically.
Well, anyhow, in recent years Far Left Crazy has begun to embrace obesity as some kind of virtue signal. “By their fruits you shall know them,” said the Lord. I didn’t know He meant it literally.
These people, who insist that they’re the brightest of the bright, need to be mocked, need to be laughed at! And Time Magazine probably needs to go out of business. Stop buying it.