School Makes 3-Year-Olds Sign Pledge Not to Use ‘Transphobic Language’

Let’s see, now… how can I phrase this most gently? Oh, I know!

Public school officials are perverted wackos who shouldn’t ever be allowed near  children.

Think it ain’t so? Well, go ahead–you try to find an innocent and reasonable explanation for the teachers at this school in England having little three-year-olds formally pledge never to use “transphobic language” ( ).

Once again the Mother Country leads the way down to Avernus. This is the Turnham Primary School in South London, a building that looks like either a prison or an old-fashioned mental hospital

. The pledge also requires toddlers to promise to eschew “homophobic” language and “to be tolerant of people with different sexual orientations and lifestyles.” This brilliant idea, reports The Daily Mail, originated with the teachers at Turnham, who “introduced the document to help stamp out playground prejudice against transgender people.”

So that was a major problem, was it–three-year-olds being nasty about weird sexual proclivities?

I”m pretty sure I couldn’t sign my name when I was three years old. Nor did I know a single thing about “lifestyles,” to say nothing of poor lost souls getting portions of their anatomy chopped off so they can say they are members of the sex opposite to that proclaimed by the chromosomes in every cell of their bodies. If little children do know about this stuff, it’s because some sleazy “teacher” insisted on telling them all about it. Teachers are “change agents,” you know.

Please, please–if you love your children, do not send them to a public school. Ever.

Hymn: ‘This is My Father’s World’

The heavens proclaim the glory of God, and the firmament showeth his handiwork.

This is one of those ancient hymns you learn in Sunday school–if they’re not too busy bull-riding in your church–and never forget. The video is performed by Fernando Ortega. Here are the lyrics’

This is my Father’s world, and to my listening ears

All nature sings, and round me rings the music of the spheres.

This is my Father’s world: I rest me in the thought

Of rocks and trees, of skies and seas; his hand the wonders wrought.

This is my Father’s world, the birds their carols raise,

The morning light, the lily white, declare their maker’s praise.

This is my Father’s world: he shines in all that’s fair;

In the rustling grass I hear him pass; he speaks to me everywhere.

Pay special attention to this last verse–words we need to hear.

This is my Father’s world, O let me ne’er forget

That though the wrong seems oft so strong, God is the ruler yet.

This is my father’s world; why should my heart be sad?

The Lord is King; let the heavens ring!

God reigns; let the earth be glad!

There has never been a time, in my lifetime, when the wrong ever seemed so strong as it seems today. But God is the ruler yet: all the wonderful works of His hands, which we see everywhere, declare to us: “God is nigh.”

How to Write a YA Best-Seller

If my publishers and I were not committed to books fit for the Christian family, I could make a lot of money for us.

See, I’ve learned the formula for creating a Young Adults fiction best-seller. Reading and reviewing a lot of real YA best-sellers has given me a feel for it.

Try it yourself. Here are the ingredients.

1. Kids with super-strength, super-smarts, great kung-fu, or magic. The 11-year-old girl in your story must be able to beat up full-grown, able-bodied men. Kids get a real rush out of this. In real life, adults are always telling them what to do. But in YA fiction, the tables are turned and the kids always come out on top.

Don’t be afraid to make these confrontations really violent. Anything goes, as long as the child wins.

2. Invisible, irrelevant, or totally ineffectual parents. You may have noticed that some YA kid heroes and heroines come from homes where the parents are just out to lunch. Don’t laugh–remember “After-School Special”? When did you ever see a normal set of parents on that hit show?

Harry Potter, for instance, got to have his cake and eat it, too. His real parents, wonderful people, were dead. His foster parents were jidrools, and he ran rings around them. This way you get to honor your parents and make fools of them at the same time.

3. Lots and lots of blood ‘n’ guts. Go for the graphic. The bad guys in your stories, or anyone who happens to get in the kids’ way, don’t deserve to live, anyhow. Make internal organs external. Remember, if it ever evolves into a video game or a movie, there will be lots of screaming and many bodies flying all around the place.

4. Always include a dollop of soft-core paganism. Don’t go overboard and show your super-kids flaying human sacrifices to Xipe Totec and dancing around in the skins. But the pagan flavoring is indispensable! Especially if you want to wind up getting published by Scholastic. [Oops. Did I just kill my chances here? Oh, well…]

It doesn’t have to be all that subtle. I read one YA fantasy novel in which the super-girl was actually the niece of the pagan Philistine fish god, Dagon. Or your kid characters can acquire immortality. Or commune with Nature Spirits and get really good advice from them.

5. But whatever you do, avoid the real God! If you’ve efficiently packed your YA novel with pagan gods and goddesses, assorted “spiritual entities,” deathless vampires, and immortal teens who are really hot although they still have go to school and sit through algebra classes (can you imagine an eternity of that!), there will be no opening for the real God to get in.

6. Just don’t make it too obvious. You want to rope in the Christian parents who want their child to develop the habit of reading. These potential customers are not inclined to look too deeply into any book their children might enjoy. If you are reasonably discreet about your paganism, these Christian readers will never notice it.

And there you have it, boys and girls–now sit right down and right some truly awful YA fiction. Let’s see how far these ingredients can take you.

Pastor Gored by Mad Bull–in Church!

Ancient fresco showing Minoan “bull dancers”–or are these athletes not dancing, but trying to stay alive?

Well, here’s something you don’t see in church every Sunday: the pastor getting gored by an angry bull ( ).

It really happened, recently, at Solid Rock Church in Ohio. Right there in the church sanctuary, Pastor Lawrence Bishop was gored nearly to death by a bull. It was an unscripted part of a special church program called “Stop the Bull,” meant to address the issues of drug abuse and bullying, felt by the pastor to be particularly pressing in the Solid Rock neighborhood.

If the above link works, here is the actual video of this incident, provided by Solid Rock Church.

Gee, this is even edgier than Christian cage fighting!

Other churches around the country are already scrambling to outdo Solid Rock. “If their pastor can just about get himself killed, trying to ride a bull in church, well, we’ve got that beat!” says Pastor Rabadash Jones of Happening Now Church, Florida. “Alligator wrassling! We have set up a pool in the middle of our church and put some mighty big, mean gators in it. But I think my assistant pastor can tame ’em.”

Squawking Idiot Episcopal Church in Lenin Falls, NY, “steers clear of violence,” said Priestess Happy Octopus Starshine, “but we defy any of those cowboy churches in the Midwest to top our brothel! We’re already convinced we’re going to have to enlarge the church doors, once our knocking-shop opens. And by the way, we will cater to all seven genders. It don’t get more seeker-friendly than this!”

But according to Rev. Tom O’Bedlam, of St. Kerchak’s, in Bismuth, Minnesota, “It’s always best to stick to basics; so we’ll just go with plain old human sacrifice. Our marketing research consistently shows that to be a winner.”

Comment Contest: Down the Home Stretch

Okay–now we’ve got 2,800 comments on this blog, and whoever posts No. 3,000 will win a signed copy of one of my books (your choice).

Posting a comment here is as easy as pie. Even I can do it!

Just scroll down to the bottom of the article and click “Leave a Reply,” and you’re in business.

I won’t post comments that include f-bombs or other profanities, that attempt to sell something, or are personally abusive to me or any other commenter.

Yes, even liberals can play, as long as they play by the rules.

And if you’ve never commented here before, and would like to–well, what’s holding you back?

So You Want to Give More Power to the Government?

See that picture? It was taken inside a state-run psychiatric hospital–a facility recently abandoned and left to rust and rot. In fact, if you search for “images of abandoned psychiatric hospitals,” you’ll find a whole photo gallery.

Here’s another abandoned hospital, on the outside. Nice, isn’t it? And inside it’s full of metal and plastic and equipment and furniture that could have been salvaged, and should have been–but wasn’t.

Before we surrender absolute power to the government (so they can Save the Planet, or achieve Social Justice, or whatever), maybe we ought to take a closer look at what governments do with the power they already have.

In my home town some years ago, they decided they needed to expand the middle school. So they spent two years building a great big extension, at a cost of millions of dollars. And  very shortly afterward–while we were still paying for it!–they decided that they didn’t need the building after all, and shut it down. (So first we expand the schools, and then, almost immediately afterward, we contract them. Some folks just can’t make up their minds.) They left it shut down for a few years, refusing to do any maintenance, so they could later plead that the building–which we were still paying for!–was now unuseable, might as well sell the property and let the school be torn down so we can have some more condos.

At least if some developer’s bright idea goes belly-up, he’s stuck with the tab. Knowing that, the private sector does try to avoid disastrous money-losing schemes.

But we are on the hook for government’s disastrous money-losing schemes.

And please don’t forget how efficiently government protects New Orleans from hurricanes.

Our Most Expensive President

What are we to make of a national leader who never tires of loudly denouncing “inequality,” and yet–at the public’s expense!–starts off the year by dining at a chi-chi restaurant which charges $500,000 a year for “Charter Membership”?

And how about that leader’s wife who takes time off from hectoring the people about their eating habits, and meddling with school cafeteria menus, to stuff her face at this same incredibly costly restaurant–again, at our expense?

Well, that’s what the President of all 57 states and the Worst Lady did for supper on Jan. 1, according to the Weekly Standard ( ).

Oh, you can low-ball it and become a lowly “Special Member” for a mere $50,000. Either way, dinner for two will cost you about $1,000. They have a prix fixe menu, whatever that is, for $295.

There has never been a president who has rubbed our noses in it like the one we’ve got now. He could hardly be more contemptuous of us if he piled up a heap of tax money on the White House lawn and set fire to it.

Yes–fine dining, at extravagant cost, for a gavone who pronounces “corps” as “corpse” and claims to be able to speak “Austrian,” and so on. I would love to see the total tab for this lout’s entertainment, over six years.

Is this obscene, or what?

And where’s Occupy Wall Street?

If the Koch Bros. feel like dropping $1,000 on a single meal, they have to do it on their own dime. That makes it none of our business.

But when The Defender of the Poor and The Dietary Conscience of the Nation do it, and we suckers have to pay for it–

Well, we ought to be deeply ashamed of ourselves.

Fun With Videos: Mongolian Throat Singing

All right, all right–I’m having fun posting videos, now that I’ve figured out how to do it. Eventually the novelty will wear off.

Meanwhile, get a load of this–Mongolian throat singing. Is this cool, or what?

For those of you who’ve been reading my Bell Mountain books, this is what the Ghols sound like when they sing. Just close your eyes and imagine you’re King Ryons, riding with his loyal Ghols around him.

The Worst Public Speaker Ever

And just as an afterthought…

You may be able to overlook her unbridled lust for money, and power for its own sake, and her absolute lack of scruple when it comes to obtaining either one. You may be able to tolerate her total inability to tell the truth, anytime, anywhere, about anything.

But are you tough enough to endure four years of Hillary Clinton’s public speaking?

In the above video, Mrs. Clinton puts on what she conceives to be a Southern black person’s accent. This is truly teeth-gnashing stuff!

And she got away with it!

Can you even imagine the reaction if this stuff ever came out of the mouth of, say, Dick Cheney?

As Steve Brown says, You think about that!

I am Entitled…

I am the greatest basketball player in the world, and I am entitled to be recognized as such by each and every one of you. Or else I’ll report you to the Human Rights Commission.

The video proves my claim–just watch! I’m the guy making all those baskets and blocking all those shots. Whoever filmed it mistakenly said it was Wilt Chamberlain when all the time it was me, Lee Duigon. Anyhow, there never was a Wilt Chamberlain. It was always me.

That’s a fact–because I say so. I am entitled to my own facts. And instead of writing me off as crazy, you should all be elbowing each other out of the way to curry favor with me. Build rest rooms specially for me! Allow me to use the women’s showers whenever I please. Invent new pronouns and force college and high school kids to use them. Above all, remember to call me “Wilt” and constantly praise my basketball prowess. Anybody who doesn’t is a bigot and a hater and an enemy of the human race.


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