What can I do to get readers involved here? I have a new book coming out any day now–Ozias, Prince in Peril–and maybe some kind of contest might help promote it.
And I’d like to have some fun now, in case they pack me off to the hospital later.
Comment contest? Short essay contest? Cool ideas for the next book contest? I don’t know–somebody must have a better idea than I have.
Time for a cigar… and a bit of cogitation (mustn’t waste good weather).
How to rev up interest in this blog? How to inject excitement? Gee, I wish I knew!
We’re less than 3,000 away from having had 100,000 comments. I really feel I ought to do something special to mark that milestone. At the same time, my viewership is only half of what it was two years ago. What to do, what to do…?
Jazz up the prizes, maybe? Books and T-shirts–maybe that’s boring. Not to be compared to a lamp with a genie in it. Or your own little country to boss around.
I suppose I could have another contest to see who can offer the best idea for the next contest. [He just manages to duck a rotten grapefruit.] (I’m guessing that means “No!”) A foreign policy contest?
As you can see, I just don’t know! Stuck, stymied, brought to an impasse–and therefor open to suggestions. Feel free to make as many as you please.
Sorry, everybody, but the deal fell through (never really got off the ground) and the winner of our comment contest will not, after all, be awarded the gold mask of Tutankhamen… or anybody else’s, either.
Comment No. 96,000 was posted yesterday by Phoebe. She already as the T-shirt, and those little army men who come alive at night while you’re asleep, so I guess her prize will be an autographed copy of Behold!
To those who complain about the same few people winning all the contests–well, don’t you think I’d like to have scads of readers equally prolific in their comments? The more comments you post, the greater your chance of winning. Most of our regular commenters have already won, some more than once.
The next goal here will be 10o,000 comments. That’s a big flashy number and certainly deserves a prize. Believe me, folks, the door is open for more comments. I only delete obnoxious Far Left crazies; and that’s a public service.
Onward to 100 thou…
This could be you!
We do have a comment contest going–whoever posts Comment No.96,000 wins–but it’s going rather slowly. I wonder if I need to offer more attractive prizes.
So how about this? The winner of the contest gets a full professorship in Higher Mathematics, with full tenure and fantastic benefits. I was going to say “at a world-class university of your choice,” but I’m not quite sure I can swing it. But they do have an opening at Fatzovich U. in Bukharin City, Kazakhstan, and I expect we can offer that.
Otherwise the winner will have to be content with either an autographed copy of one of my books or a nice red T-shirt that says “If They Have to Kill Us, They’ve Lost.”
So let’s get cracking with that contest, before that opening at Fatzovich gets filled by some casual passerby. All comments are eligible except for nasty or silly stuff that cheeses off everybody else.
(No, Byron, I cannot see my way to offering a bicycle.)
Actually it’s just one prize, but holy moly!
Win the legendary Peacock Throne of Persia! I mean, if these delicate negotiations go just right. You never know when those guys are gonna back out of a deal.
But first somebody has to post Comment No. 96,000 on this blog, and then we’ll see about prizes. Just imagine, though–you’ve got the Peacock Throne! Set it up in your yard and watch people bow down as they pass: they won’t be able to help themselves.
Our you could win an autographed copy of one of my books (your choice), or a cool T-shirt that says “If they have to kill us, they’ve lost.”
Sorry, we are not offering live peacocks. The neighbors complain about live peacocks.
Win an autographed copy of my new book, Behold! Simply be the lucky reader to post comment No. 96,000.
That being said… Big Tech has chopped off half my audience, so it’s going to take longer to rack up comments. Just now we’re almost at 95,000. I don’t know how to fight them. Very hard for me to believe that all those readers just packed up and left!
Let me say this sincerely: A) Every view of this blog is a poke in the eye against those who would censor Christian and conservative bloggers. B) I am grateful to everyone who keeps on coming here.
P.S.–You can win a cool T-shirt if you’ve already got the book.
Your own working catapult, for instance…
I wonder if the problem with the contests that I offer here is that the prizes just don’t turn people on. An autographed book, for instance. Where’s the fun in that?
Here are a few prizes that have been suggested by persons who don’t know what they’re talking about.
Cloak of Invisibility. For one thing, I can’t post a picture of it because it’s invisible. It costs a fortune and is super-easy to lose. And also you can’t put it on backwards because then it makes everything invisible to you.
Full-scale working catapult. Show your neighbors who’s boss! This catapult can hurl a 100-pound stone a full 300 feet. And you don’t need a license for it! Don’t believe me? Stop in at your local police station and ask how to get a catapult license.
The key to Fort Knox. Not allowed, actually. The government will just make you hand it over. They’re very touchy about that.
Magic helmet that grants wishes. Sorry, but they stopped making these some 20 years ago and some doofus wished they’d forget how to make them.
Besides which, our Christmas Carol Contest has as its purpose to spread Christmas cheer and get us ready for the Christmas season. Let’s keep those carol nominations coming.
What’s this–no Christmas Carol Contest entries today? A quote attributed to Yogi Berra comes to mind: “No one goes there anymore, it’s too crowded.”
Well, we’re not too crowded here! Have you noticed we don’t have commercials? We aren’t trying to sell you anything.
No–we’re just trying to create a place where we can all come together to share hymns, prayers, a healthy laugh or two, and discussions of the issues of the day, if anyone is so inclined. Our comment and carol contests are open to all–and that’s where we need to be crowded!
You can enter as many times as you like, too. Even if it’s your first time here.
I went to bed last night with just one comment left to go in the comment contest. I found it posted here this morning… by Elder Mike.
So that’s it, Michael–you posted Comment No. 91,000 and that makes you the winner. You have but to claim your prize and let me know your mailing address. (Sorry, but the deal for an honorary doctorate from Fimbo University fell through.)
An autographed copy of one of my Bell Mountain books (your choice of title–I know you already have the first two)
A T-shirt that says “If they have to kill us, they’ve lost”
A little bag of plastic army men. (Hey, you never know!)
The next contest, of course, will be our annual Christmas Carol Contest, starting on the day after Thanksgiving. How time flies!
There are fewer than 400 comments left to go before we have a comment contest winner!
Wouldn’t you love to tell your friends and neighbors, not to mention your whole extended family, “I won one of Lee’s comment contests!”? Think of all the times you could tell your grandchildren about it. Or buttonhole passersby on the sidewalk, and tell them. And then there is the spectacular prize that’ll go to the winner! (No, it’s not a one-way ticket to Kong’s Island. Whatever gave you that idea?)
Comment as often as you like! Someone’s bound to win!
(Yeesh, can you imagine Tolkien doing this? I can’t.)
