Tag Archives: the view

Torture at the Laundromat

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One of the stiffer penalties you incur when you have to go to the laundromat during the day is exposure to The View. This Far Left talk show has the power to cause a dog’s teeth to fall out. It has been known to liquefy human brains. Couldn’t we just get one of those soap operas in which the characters spout incoherent dialogue and the story makes no sense?

Today they had a guest who maintained that “You don’t have to study anything to know that socialism is right.” One would think natural-born stupidity would suffice for that, but our schools make sure to back it up with an assiduous avoidance of modern history. Otherwise someone might notice that socialism has been an abject failure everywhere, and continues to be one today.

He was followed by a parade of whining leftid jidrools proclaiming Donald Trump the worst president ever–Sorry! That title belongs to ol’ *Batteries Not Included, hands down–and complaining how they suffer, just knowing Trump is in the White House.

Anything that upsets these people has got to be good for the country.

Oh–and in case we missed it, “T*H*E   R*U*S*S*I*A*N*S” provided the Green Party kook who made the Democoms lose in Ohio yesterday. Drat them pesky Russians. Whoever they are.

That anyone would choose to listen to this stuff on purpose is way beyond me.

‘Do You Love Daytime TV?’ (2015)

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I have to go to the laundromat today, and again The View will be on TV–they just have to have a television set in the laundromat, in case you want to watch something other than the clothes going round and round inside the dryer. I think I prefer the dryer.


Trying to get everything written, two hours gets torn out of my day.

BTW, I’m convinced it’s true about daytime TV killing flies.

‘What’s Worse Than Pulling Teeth?’ (2013)

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Daytime TV: that’s what’s worse than pulling teeth. Whether it’s the gabbling harpies of “The View” or the unbridled drooling lust displayed on any game show, this is pain for which there is no Novocain.


Gee, I just realized that when I go to the laundromat in a few minutes, I’ll be subjecting myself to daytime television.

Do You Love Daytime TV?

Do you see that picture of dead flies? They were killed by exposure to daytime television.

I came close to joining them today, stranded as I was in a doctor’s waiting room. But I got out just as my toenails and fingernails started to get brittle and fall off.

At least I was too early for any of the soap operas. Those, I think, are produced on other planets. Someday they’re going to give themselves away. For example, Brittony makes goo-goo eyes at Podsol, but suddenly changes the subject.

“Probably you have been wondering,” she says, “why I behave like a completely talent-less person who has never done any acting before, and also very near-sighted, trying to read cue cards with my lines on them–lines that sound as if they were written by not-very-bright teenagers who do a lot of drugs…” And then she turns into The Blob and engulfs poor Podsol before he can get away.

No soaps for me today. I had to make do with annoying shows devoted to the ecstatic worship of celebrities I never heard of. (Fame ain’t so famous anymore.) Then Rachel Ray. Then, horror of horrors, The View. Poe or Lovecraft never thought up anything half as awful as The View. It hadn’t been on for 30 seconds before the flies started falling off the windowpanes.

Again I ask, and yet again: if this is the stuff we pump into our minds every day, by way of popular culture, what long-term effects will it have on us? It has already given us Obama. Where will it end? Can a people nurtured on pure mindlessness even survive?

Take a last look at those flies, killed by The View.

You might be next.

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