Another Sunday school classic, here sung by the Vagle Brothers–Trust and Obey, with background sets by God the Father.
Cats Who Won’t Share
Really, serving two cats on just one plate is asking for trouble. This is how dunderheads start wars. Nor does human interference rectify the problem.
We have two cats, so we serve them identical portions of the same food on two identical plates. Y’know what they do? They switch plates several times in the middle of the meal.
Be very careful of people who do that.
I’m Trying, Honest
If you’re wondering why I haven’t reblogged any posts from Christian bloggers lately, well, I’m trying! WordPress hasn’t been letting me do it. I go through all the steps, and on the original blog the message appears: the post has been reblogged on my site. Only of course it hasn’t. It’s been shot off somewhere into cyber-limbo.
I won’t even describe what I have to do now to get a post published. And I’d better hurry up with this one!
Encore, ‘All Hail the Power of Jesus’ Name’
I’ve been leaning on the power of Jesus’ name pretty heavily of late, and it’ll certainly do for a bonus hymn today: All Hail the Power of Jesus’ Name, written by Edward Perronet in 1779.
Twiddles, the Mud Puppy (‘Oy, Rodney’)
Introducing Chapter CCCLXIX of her epic romance, Oy, Rodney, Violet Crepuscular deplores the actions of a Scurveyshire mob bursting into Coldsore Hall in pursuit of Sir Robin Banks, the aristocratic thief. “I deplore the actions of the mob,” she confides in the reader, “but I have no choice but to tell the story as it unfolds.”
Lord Jeremy Coldsore and his boon companion, Willis Twombley, the American adventurer who think he’s Sargon of Akkad, can only stand helplessly by as the mob rampages throughout luxurious, ancient, legendary Coldsore Hall. By and by they grow weary of standing helplessly by, and begin to visit some of the rooms through which the mob has passed. In doing this, they discover Wet Willy, an aged footman who has been secretly living in the hall for decades.
“Didn’t my father dismiss you some thirty years ago?” demands Jeremy.
“He did,” says Willy, “but I could hardly leave poor Twiddles to fend for himself, could I?”
Jeremy recoils in horror from the sight of Twiddles, a large Canadian mud puppy. WordPress recoils in horror from showing a picture of it. Suffice it to say it’s a very large salamander with external gills, red and bushy, and a ferocious temper which moves it to snap viciously at the nearest hand.
“Ain’t he cute?” says Willis.
“You’ve been here–with this… creature–all this time?” marvels Lord Jeremy. “What have you been eating?”
“Mostly Wheaties,” confesses the aged footman. “I sneak into the kitchen in the dead of night and steal them.”
Just then they are interrupted by a lusty roar from the mob: they have captured the aristocratic thief.
Here the chapter breaks, owing to computer problems.
(Got it in after all–I think.)
‘Revenue Enhancement’? Do They Mean ‘Taxes’?
Let’s see… Huge chunks of the economy have been shut down for most of this year so far, innumerable small businesses have gone extinct, millions of jobs lost, people really hurting… So now it’s time to–raise their taxes???
Here in New Jersey our philosopher-kings are calling it “revenue enhancement,” which sounds so much nicer than “taxing their asses off when they can least afford it.” Don’t be too surprised if your state starts talking “revenue enhancement.”
Are they crazy? Now of all times, the people can’t afford it. Gee, if they totally finish us off, then there’ll be no revenue!
Governed by persons who belong in straitjackets: it’s quite a problem.
July’s a Disaster
G’day–or not. Byron the Quokka here, and it’s official: here at this blog, July’s a disaster.
Daily viewership is down by 120 views a day. Ouch! But that’s only the blog. If you think we’re having a picnic at Quokka University, think again!
We have lost our most celebrated special guest lecturer before the semester even starts. Professor Aristotle Bottle, “the one-man philosophy course,” the Living Legend of Smartness, world-renowned author of Wet Wood Burns the Best–holy cow, we’re not gonna have him! He has been hospitalized after attempting to prove that an open manhole cover does not necessarily imply the existence of a manhole. Broke his coccyx going down.
Well, I’m glad we haven’t charged any money for his lectures, and I’m glad we didn’t pay him up front. But how do you replace a superstar like that?
We’re open to suggestions!
‘Sink the Bismarck!’ (2017)
There are still people alive who were here for World War II, but you’d almost think that war had never happened, judging by the little that we’ve learned from it.
The British ruling class spent years appeasing the Third Reich, making excuses for Hitler, trying to be Mr. Nice Guy, and they still got the living daylights bombed out of their country–and a brand-new German battleship, the Bismarck, determined to cut off their imported food supply.
Some folks you just can’t be nice to.
‘Praise to the Lord, the Almighty’
I’m doing the best I can, here, with the hymns. I only have a few minutes before the connection times out. So here (I hope!) is Praise to the Lord, the Almighty, sung by the Altar of Praise Men’s Chorale.
Cats & the Joy of Chairs
I’ve probably got about three minutes before I lose the Internet again–so here we proudly present cats and kittens getting good use out of chairs. Probably humans would enjoy doing the same, if they only gave themselves the chance.