Tag: everything is racist

Coach ‘Suspended’… For Quoting Bible

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Amazon.com: Peeing on The Seat is Like Missing A Slam Dunk Vintage Metal Tin Sign Wall Art Decor Home Décor Bathroom Décor Funny for Home Kitchen Bar Room Garage Decor 16"×12" :

Sorry–couldn’t resist the sign. I don’t have much respect for sports.

Ooooh! You quoted the Bible! Taboo! Verboten!

The basketball coach at Texas Tech has been “suspended” for quoting the Bible to one of his players (https://thefederalist.com/2023/03/06/texas-tech-suspends-head-basketball-coach-for-quoting-the-bible/). Seems it was racist! Somehow.

The verses in question supposedly had to do with “serving their masters” and “being more receptive” to coaching. Yes, in several places, the Bible does tell us to serve our masters–because everyone, no matter how high up the ladder, has a master in Jesus Christ. It’s about conscientiousness. It most certainly is not about racism.

What, exactly, is this coach in trouble for? Would he be in the soup if he’d quoted… oh…Obama? Or Lenin? Marx?

Of course not.

College hoops is big business whose purpose is to rake in money. The “education” part is a fig leaf. But in the world of public education, Woke tops every other consideration.

That’s why our country’s on the ropes.

‘Now You’ve Heard Everything’ (2019)

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A Tale of Two Cities, Part 3: Two Women | The Heavy Laden Bookshelf

“There’s knittin’ and there’s knittin’…” –Madame Defarge

You’d think knitting would be a harmless, peaceful way to spend your time–but not if the Wokies have anything to say about it!

Turns out that this, too, is Racist… and you need Persons Of Color to straighten you out.

Now You’ve Heard Everything

The whole idea seems to be “No more fun allowed!” Live out your days in the dreary, hopeless, stupid world of woke.

Syince It Is Jist Moar Wite Strupemmasy!!!

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1,019 Mad Science Lab Stock Photos, Pictures & Royalty-Free Images - iStock

Nhaow the Trooth it comes Out!!! Syints it “is” Wyte Strupremmasy in Disskies!+!! And that is “The” reezin I fluncted Kemmistry!!!!!!

Yiu doughnt beleave me??? Well, jist loook “at” that Pixture!!!! That there, it is a Wite gye!!!!!!! It Is a Wyte gye dooing kemmastry!! and thay aslo doo Fizzix tooo!!!!Evry ware yiu look is Wyte Superpremmasy!!!!

Heer “at” “the” Stoodint Soviet,, we has de-sided to Do Sumbthing abuout It!!! We voated to get ridd “of awl” the Syints at This here Yoonavarsitty untill we can has Queer Black Femmanist Syints and “no” Other kyned!!!

And aslo we Are goingto ficks that thare Peeriotic Tabel so it woont “has”no moar Wyte Ellamints!!! Jist Black ones lyke Carbin and that stuph thay put In Penssals!!!!!! This it “Is” Very Good becose it maiks tha Tabel mutch shoarter!!!!! (We Can aslo has Chalklit becose It is a nother Braown Ellamint!)

Fromb naow On we whil Not alouw The Collidge to teetch Any Thing Wyte!!!!!! And we Are aslo whirking On “getting Ridd” of Wyte Payper tooo!!!

Stupid Stuff from Norway: Is White Paint Racist?

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What Did Vikings Really Drink? - A Historical Norse Investigation

Norway quaffs the Kool-Aid

I wish I could say this is a satire, but it isn’t.

Norway’s University of Bergen has spent over $1 million to find out if white paint is… “racist” (https://nypost.com/2023/01/20/norway-funds-research-to-find-out-if-white-paint-is-racist/). Actually, it sounds like they’ve already made up their minds and are only “doing research” to spend the money before someone takes it back.

White paint, says one of the jidrools in charge of this caper, helped “contribute to white supremacy” and [trumpet fanfare, please] has “planetary consequences.”

Babble, babble, babble.

Has Western civilization become too stupid to survive?

College Pays Off $36 Million in Lawsuit

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37,319 Pile Of Money Photos and Premium High Res Pictures ...

Look for the tuition to be going up soon at Oberlin College! After 6 years of litigation, the college has finally paid $36 million–in damages and attorneys’ fees–to a bakery that college officials tried to drive out of business by smearing it as “racist” (https://www.wkyc.com/article/news/local/lorain-county/oberlin-college-completes-payment-gibsons-bakery-defamation-case/95-ff4da16c-37d1-433f-bc1b-3e1ee219da29).

[Special Challenge! Can you name five things that aren’t racist?]

Once upon a time, an Oberlin student, with two others, tried to shoplift at the bakery. The baker ran after him and tackled him. Voila! “College officials” swung into action to destroy the business.

It would be just if said “officials” were made to feel pain and hardship over this, but they’ll just pass it along to the next generation of suckers who register at Oberlin.

As we speak, tuition at Oberlin runs from $30,000-plus a year to $61,000 plus.

The things people find to do with their money…

Uh-Oh! More Racism!

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Daddy Long Legs 411 - The Infinite Spider

If spiders had to pay for airline tickets, Daddy Long Legs would get soaked.

Wow! Here’s yet another thing you never knew was Racist!

President SloJo sez that airlines charging extra fees for extra legroom are being unfair to [trumpet fanfare] People Of Color (POCs) and other “marginalized Americans” (https://viewfromthewing.com/president-biden-charging-for-extra-legroom-seats-after-ticket-purchase-is-racist/). Betcha never knew that!

Wait a minute… Are these the same “Marginalized Americans” whom the nooze networks put on center stage every single day, and for whom our politicians scramble all over each other to please and appease?

Confound it, though! Everywhere you look, everything is racist. And we have always known that long-legged marginalized Americans of Color (LLMAOC’s) are the most marginalized and discriminated-against of all. Except for maybe long-legged marginalized transgendered Americans of Color with male pattern baldness (LLNTAOCWMPB’s). They’re really up against it.

Well, the government can at least punish the airlines.

‘Tanystropheus’ Nickname is Racist

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See the source image

Well, why not? Everything else is racist. So why not long-extinct reptiles with preposterously long necks?

‘Tanystropheus’ Nickname is Racist

Some of you have wondered, “Is Hormad High School” a real place? Well, hormads were artificial humans created by a mad scientist in Edgar Rice Burroughs’ Synthetic Men of Mars. Here in Reality, our self-anointed elites would like nothing better than to replace us all with artificial people, or maybe just robots, that will obey them and never make waves. In that sense, “hormads” are already with us. We just call them Democrats for laughs.

MSNBC: Bad Driving? Caused by ‘Racism’!

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Nine Ways To Avoid Car Accidents | EHS Today

Racism strikes again!

Why do we despise and mistrust our nooze media? Consider this clanger from MSNBC.

Increased traffic deaths are caused by… you guessed it: racism! (https://www.newsbusters.org/blogs/nb/brad-wilmouth/2022/08/30/msnbc-tries-link-surge-car-crash-deaths-racism)

Couldn’t possibly be increasingly bad driving, could it?

The proof of this absurd claim, says some dindle on MSNBC, is that two more blacks die in traffic accidents, per 100,000, than whites. Eight blacks, a little more than six whites. He wails, “How can we help to fight this?” Another big job for Big Government!

Gee–is there any problem, anywhere, that is not caused by “racism”?

We know they’d like to take our cars away: Save The Planet, blah-blah. Noozies would get to keep their cars, them and politicians, union members, and the like. Nice big limos for them. Ride the bus with the chickens for you.

Walter Williams once suggested, facetiously, setting the speed limit at 5 mph. That’d do it, big-time. We are beginning to wonder if noozies took that seriously. (We miss you, Dr. Williams!) You can’t make jokes to these people: libs have no sense of humor.

But I’ll tell you one thing that’s not a joke, and isn’t funny–allowing leftids to be in charge of anything.

 

Dogs’ Names Are… ‘Racist’?

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Dog with question mark Stock Photo by ©alphaspirit 142306850

We got anether Crysis “on” our hannds!!!!

Thare’s a payper “out” nhow that says Dog “whith” Wite Naimes thay get adapted moar “than” Dogs whith Black Naimes witch jist gose “To” shoew yiu that Dogs and peple that adapt Dogs thay “Are” awl Racist!!!!!!

And then sum Hater he sayed “O comb “on!”! how menny Dogs are Naimed Wokeesha or Jummal”?”?” “and oncet yiu Adapt A Dog,, caint yiu Naime it any Naime yiu whant?”?”?” So sicks of us we beet himb Up!!!

Well, it dint taik The Stoodint Soviet enny tyimb At Awl to “swing” Into Axion!!!! We quick drewed up New Rools “foar” Adapting Dogs!! 1(one!)@: Awl Dogs thay nhow has to has Black Naimes!!! 2(too!)#: Awl peeple who Adapt Dogs thay nhow has to has Black Naimes tooo!!!!

It doughnt Mater “that” i doughnt Know ennboddy whoo Has “a” Dog!!! Thare is a gye in the dorm,, he “has” a Pet Cockaroatch naimed Pdgaa oar sumb Thing lyke That butt i doughnt Know weather thats a Wite Naime or a Black Naime or sumpthing Ellse!!!!” Prefester Joanes he hadded a Dog “but” it runned aweiaygh!! (Sumbuddy sayed it “was Not” a Dog but “a” Ant-Eeater!) Well iff ennyboddy Ellse thay has a Dog thay beter Chainge it to a Black Naime or we whil Putt themb “In” Sensertivitry Traning!!!!

CNN: Economic Forecasts Are Racist

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(Overqualified for jobs with CNN)

What? CNN is still here? I thought they’d been voted off the island.

But they’re still babblin’ Far Left Crazy talking points–like, for instance, “Who gets to define whether we’re in a recession? Eight white economists you’ve never heard of!” (https://www.newsbusters.org/blogs/business/joseph-vazquez/2022/07/06/insane-cnn-argued-recession-proclamations-are)

Can you follow this logic? Economic forecasts are made by “white guys,” and are therefore both unreliable… and “racist.” Because to the polyps on CNN everything is racist. Economists have not defined us as being in a recession yet “because [they are] not racially diverse.”

Obviously what we need are some economists who are black lesbians from Cambodia who are here illegally and have just had abortions. That’ll make the forecasts more “diverse.”

Heck, I feel more diverse already!