The Missing TV Listings

2+ Thousand Australian Quokka Royalty-Free Images, Stock Photos & Pictures  | Shutterstock

G’day, boys ‘n’ gulls. Byron the Quokka here, minus our weekly TV listings. Well, the Big Guy did mention that he’s as sick as he can be, just now. And I don’t like to take his place.

So it’s no TV listings, and no Joe Collidge, either. Too bad–I was all set to trot out my Tyrannosaurus rex imitation. Last time I did, a kangaroo fainted.

Anyhow, the poor guy barely got through the day today. I’d like to make it up to him somehow. Maybe tomorrow? If we can lure Violet Crepuscular into taking a day off.

‘A New “T. Rex”…with Feathers?’ (2019)

T. Rex Like You Haven't Seen Him: With Feathers - The New ...

Dinosaur… or winosaur?

Certain pieces of God’s creation aren’t here anymore, but there is much that we can learn by studying fossils. There’s also just as much, if not more, that we’ll never learn.

About dinosaurs, for instance.

A New ‘T. rex’… with Feathers?

Sometimes our speculations (I resist the urge to call them flights of fancy) are a little hard to swallow.

But I do think God the Father likes His children to exercise their brains. Some of those speculations have to turn out to be right!

A Parade of Tyrannosaurs

I want to show you some of the various “Tyrannosaurs” that have passed for true and scientifically accurate reconstructions. I’m finding the logistics a bit tricky, so wish me luck.

Megalosaurus, the first ever dinosaur discovery | National ...

This was Settled Science in the 1800s. The statue is supposed to be Megalosaurus, the first dinosaur to be given a scientific name; but it belongs to the same general group as Tyrannosaurus and one could be easily mistaken for the other. This was the monster featured in Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s The Lost World.

Marx Toys - Dinosaur Toys Filling a Need and a Toy Box

In the 1940s we had Rudolph Zallinger’s T. rex in his mural at the Peabody Museum, and toy makers stuck to his reconstruction–complete with huge beer-belly. Zallinger’s mural is awe-inspiring. I’m afraid the toy was not.

The Land Unknown - Trailer - YouTube

In the 1950s and 60s, T. rex shed his beer belly and learned to stand bolt-upright like a human being. Here he is in The Land Unknown (1957), one of my absolute favorite movies when I was eight years old.

Jurassic World': See how T. rex has ruled the blockbuster ...

Jurassic Park and its sequels gave us a Tyrannosaurus that was really scary, it could’ve eaten all the earlier models for breakfast. The science kept changing; and movie-making special effects technology changed even fast. However, T. rex was not going to be allowed to rest on these laurels

Marisa is Having Nightmares on X: "Doing some dinosaur research for a  commission and DAMN. The new T rex with feathers model is scarier in my  opinion. https://t.co/RkOhB1G3rb" / X

I call this the Skid Row Tyrannosaur. To me it looks like a giant wino. Slathering greasy, shabby feathers all over it doesn’t help at all. But if history is any guide, this monstrosity will be superseded–hopefully by something better. Or at least less unsightly.

‘The Dinosaurs That We Deserve’ (My Newswithviews Column, Jan. 11)

File:T. rex old posture.jpg - Wikipedia

Painting by Charles R. Knight: he got away with lifting the tail off the ground.

How come Settled Science never stays settled? Look at Tyrannosaurus rex. You’d hardly recognize it from one generation to the next. They keep changing it.

The Dinosaurs That We Deserve

I’m going to track down some of the more notorious representations of T. rex and post them here so you can shake your head at the changes.

I promise not to use the word “iconic.” I don’t think I’ve ever gotten so tired of a word, so fast.

What the H*** Was That?!?

T Rex in Front of a House . Past Due and Unpaid Bills Warning Concept Stock  Illustration - Illustration of deadline, demand: 190938652

I was awakened in the middle of the night last night by what sounded like someone driving a great big truck up our sidewalk, stopping under the bedroom window, and revving the engine. Or it could have been a Tyrannosaurus looking for a way in.

It was loud. Lasted for maybe a minute, then just stopped. Goosebumps all over. And of course no sign, this morning, that this had ever happened.

I know, I know, you’re gonna tell me it was just a dream. I have no evidence to put against it. It didn’t feel like a dream, that’s all I can say.

Well, if you don’t get nightmares in this day and age we’re living in… you’re just not trying.

‘A New “T. Rex”… with Feathers’ (2015)

Can we take up a collection for this poor creature?

I don’t know if they still have their 2015 reconstruction of Tyrannosaurus rex, but one can always hope they came to their senses and got rid of it.

A New ‘T. rex’… with Feathers?

As in everything else, there are fads in dinosaur science. The latest fad was feathers. By and by something else will take its place, if it hasn’t already. Maybe it’ll be clothes. Dinosaurs in clothes.

I’m sorry, but that reconstruction made the great Tyrannosaur look like something that the cat dragged in.

Should I Do Nooze Today?

Study suggests T. rex's legs were made for walkin' – not running

A new study “strongly suggests” that Tyrannosaurus rex used its legs for walking. Well, that knocks the old ballroom dancing theory into a cocked hat. The jumping-jacks theory still has a few die-hards hanging on.

I happened upon a nooze story a few minutes ago and got a blood pressure surge, nor could I restrain certain vigorous exclamations. My wife said, “I thought we weren’t going to do this on the weekend.” Get all worked up over the nooze, she means.

Well, fair enough.

Attention, readers! What would you like to see on this blog on the weekends? I’d like to see more dinosaurs, but that’s only me. What would you like? Don’t ask me to be clairvoyant–tell me! As Popeye once said, “We aims t’please!”

Coming up by and by: Byron’s TV listings.

‘Lake Murray, New Guinea: Dinosaur Sightings’ (2015)

Image result for images of tyrannosaurus and people in jungle

Can it possibly be true–there are dinosaurs gallumphing around in New Guinea?

Lake Murray, New Guinea: Dinosaur Sightings

You know what the problem is with cryptozoology? The moment cryptozoologists find a critter they were looking for, it ceases to be cryptozoology and instantly becomes zoology.

I wonder how many people actually see Lake Murray, during the course of a year.

Loch Ness is a lot easier to visit.

 

A New ‘T. rex’… with Feathers?

This is the brand-new Tyrannosaurus reconstruction at the American Museum of Natural History in New York–complete with feathers. Scientists “know” T. rex had feathers because “closely related species” about a twentieth his size have left fossils with traces of something that might be feathers. So that’s how they “know.”

Sorry, I’m not buying this. For one thing, it looks shabby–more like a “winosaur” than a “dinosaur.” I mean, really, Turok Son of Stone would’ve laughed himself silly if he ever saw a Tyrannosaur that looked like a worn-out feather duster. Or a worn-out 1960s celebrity trying to make a comeback on a 1990s TV talk show.

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Oh, well… If you can’t idly speculate about dinosaurs, what can you idly speculate about?

Make it idle enough and you just might win a chair at a prestige university.

Comment Contest… Counting Down

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Would you believe it? In our quest to post 40,000 comments, we have a mere 600 to go! The readers here should be able to do that standing on their heads. Although it would be easier to do, sitting down.

Ah! And what’s the prize for posting Comment No. 40,000? Well, it was going to be an autographed copy of my new book, The Temptation, which should be published pretty soon. But now, if I can swing it…

From the picturesque fjords of Norway! a genuine, live baby Tyrannosaurus rex! Pictured above, and pictures don’t lie. Just ask any TV noozie. The little girl in the picture is actually someone famous, disguised as a little girl. I am not at liberty to reveal her identity, but you know famous people never lie.

All comments are eligible, except: those of abuse of anyone else on this site; any comments containing blasphemy or profanity; commercials disguised as comments; remarks too inane to bother with.