Tag: 2016 presidential campaign

The Grate Pressadental Debait!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Dont she turn you on!

Hear at Collidge wee “are” al pumped up for the Debait “on” Mondy Nihgt! and Hillery she is Sure to whin!!! Then wehn She “is” Pressadint she can sick Loreta Lunch on al them De-plorrible peple waht vooted for Donold trump!

Wee are Mad becose thay tryin to fix it “so” Hillery she looks bad and that “is” wye thay not givving Her “a” coffin brake even thohg she is “in” prefect Hellth al she “had” it was jist a Little new-moania! thay trying to Make us “think” She too sick to Be pressadint!

Well Ha Ha waht abuot Trumpe’s hellth, huh, huh? My prefesser He heared that Trump he has got lepracy!!! Thats “rihgt” thare is peeces of Him “is” faling offf al the tyme “and” has got to be glooed back On!! Aslo Trumpe he is Crazy and he goin to strat a Nuculer War and we al get Killled “if” He is ellected!

Thay aslo is not Givvin Hillery a Stoul to stand “on” so she dont “look” so short, wel so waht??? It “is onely” deplorrible stopid peple whoo thay not Goin to voote “four” Her becose thay are hatful biggits but Yiu got to voote for Her Becose She “is” a wimmin!!

Wel Ha Ha she goin to whin The debait annyhow jist weight and seee! And wehn She “is” Pressadint She wil lissen to Us Interllecturals and put al them hatful biggits In Jale!!!

‘Why Aren’t I 50 Points Ahead?’

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

I’m tempted to make this a contest: whoever submits the best answer wins a free book.

Hillary Clinton wants to know why she isn’t being handed the White House on a silver platter. She seems genuinely puzzled as to why America isn’t kissing her feet and begging her to be their empress.

You may think this is too easy, this is just shooting fish in a barrel: but in the multiplicity of answers, it’d be easy to overlook a good one.

So come, on folks–explain to Hillary why she isn’t 50 points ahead.

And remember, everybody: if you don’t vote for Trump, you are helping this woman to become president. And you become her accomplice.

‘Honest Hillary’ (Ya Think?)

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

This guy is a genius. He’s sure to get elected. I mean, he’s funnier than Red Skelton ever was.

Dig the audience reaction when he says–with a straight face, mind you–in reference of Hillary Clinton, “I believe she’s honest.”

Is this one of those new-fashioned political lies–guff that everyone in the world knows is a lie, but you say it anyway and you get away with it?

Remember–if she gets elected and you didn’t vote for Trump, you are her accomplice.

Are You Deplorable?

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Democrat candidate for president, Hillary “Careless” Clinton, spoke recently at an organized sodomy fund-raider–and who ever dreamed there would someday be a presidential candidate openly wooing such an audience?

In her speech, Ol’ Careless said “half” of Donald Trump’s supporters–millions of Americans–fall into a “basket of deplorables” ( http://variety.com/2016/biz/news/hillary-clinton-donald-trump-supporters-basket-of-deplorables-1201856596/ ). She characterized us as racist, homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, Islamophobic, and any other kind of phobic that you’d care to name. Biggit, biggit, biggit, croaks the frog.

She later apologized for saying “half,” but didn’t specify whether she meant 30%, 40%, or 49%.

As for us deplorables–do we really want to know who all, in Mrs. Clinton’s book, is not deplorable?

I don’t know about you, but if I want to scare myself, but good, I just try to think what she thinks when she looks in the mirror–provided there’s a reflection. “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the ____est one of all?”

Fill in the blank if you dare… you deplorable person, you!

 

Hillary’s Fainting Tour

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

By now most of you have seen this video. But what you haven’t seen or heard are some of the more creative explanations of what’s been happening with this candidate–who, if elected, would be our country’s first president’s wife to have a president’s husband. If that’s not too confusing.

You’ve heard the “touch of pneumonia” put out by the Clinton campaign–a touch of pneumonia that’s apparently been going on for some years now. But here are some of the ones you haven’t heard.

She has been overcome by remorse for her many lies and other crimes. Oh, please. There’s no evidence this woman has a conscience.

Joe Collidge says, “she Is Pregganent so She can ‘Have’ a bortion becose She havent hadd a bortion befour.” This theory has the advantage of having been dreamed up by an intellectual.

Alex Jones slipped her a mickey. Those conspiracy talk show hosts will stop at nothing to do her a bad turn.

Someone just forgot to change her batteries. Some of us have long suspected that Clinton and other big shots aren’t human beings but robots, or maybe cyborgs.  If all they had to do was pop in some fresh batteries, that’d explain how she came to look so chipper just a few hours after the fainting episode.

So there you have ’em. Take your choice.

Is Hillary Too Sick to be President?

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

This video is a bit long, 16 minutes, but it’s important. Very important.

Here a qualified medical doctor examines the evidence made publicly available and concludes, “Hillary has advanced Parkinson’s Disease,” has had it “since at least 2012,” would be “incapable of handling the daily stresses of the presidency,” and is, in fact, “unfit for any position of responsibility.” This is apart from her moral unfitness for the job. He is talking medical fact.

The situation is unprecedented: a major party knowingly offering us, as a presidential candidate, an individual afflicted with a severe illness that would surely impede her handling of her duties.

Watch. Listen.

And pray.

If this woman winds up in the White House, our country is in big, big trouble.

UN Bigwig: Trump = ISIS

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

One thing you’ve got to say for Donald Trump–everyone who’s bad seems to be against him.

A United Nations Commissioner for Human Rights–in his day job, he is a Jordanian prince–has issued a hysterical warning against “weaponized populism,” as practiced by Trump and others, upsetting their lovely citizen-of-the-world, no-more-borders applecart and it’s awful and we’re all gonna die if this guy gets elected, etc. (  https://pjmedia.com/news-and-politics/2016/09/06/un-commissioner-warns-of-weaponized-populism-from-wilders-trump-farage-turning-into-colossal-violence/ )

The prince issued his warning at a wing-ding hosted by the Peace, Justice, and Security Foundation. *sigh* Who would dare criticize peace, justice, or security? You’d have to be a biggit-biggit-biggit.

He called Trump and other non-globalists “demagogues.”

So remember, boys ‘n’ girls, on Election Day–the UN does not want you to vote for Trump.

Top Secret Trump Campaign Memos Leaked to This Blog!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

The attached video: This is how you do it.

Two top-secret documents from Donald Trump’s presidential campaign have been slid under my door. They both have to do with Trump’s recent speech at a black church in Detroit.

Document 1

To: Candidate Donald Trump

From: Image-R-Us Political Consultants Inc.

Re: Detroit Speech

Dear Mr. Trump–To defeat Hillary Clinton, you have to make a dent in her projected 95% of the African-American vote. We concur with your reasons for giving a speech in Detroit to an African-American audience; but we strongly advise you to imitate those techniques which, in election after election, capture at least 90% of these voters for the Democrats.

In short, we recommend you out-Democrat the Democrats!

It will be easy for you to do this. First, adapt your wardrobe to the circumstances, remembering that these are simple people who must be pandered to. 1) Wear a baseball cap sideways. 2) Get very baggy jeans and where them hanging low so that your jockey shorts show.

It will also be useful to tailor your way of speaking to this audience–as, for example, Hillary Clinton did in her now-famous “Ah’m bah no means taaaared” speech. See the attached video. Again, this will be easy to do. 1) Always remember to say “axe” for “ask.” 2) Listen to audio and cultivate a kind of “preacherly” delivery.

Finally, strongly imply that you relate to these simple people’s Hip Hop culture. Slyly hint about your “stash,” and suggest that if they vote for you, there will be plenty to go around.

When in doubt, always do whatever any Democratic candidate would do. Pander, pander, pander!

We hope we have been of service to you.

Document 2

To: Image-R-Us Political Consultants Inc.

From: Donald J. Trump

Dear Sirs–You’re fired.

Yeah, They Really Did It: Dems Hope to Outlaw Climate Change Denial

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Just so you know what you’ll be getting if you vote for Hillary “Careless” Clinton, or refuse to vote for Donald Trump…

They’ve actually done it: a plan to criminalize “Climate Change Denial,” which some of us know better as common-sense skepticism, has been included in the official Democrat platform for 2016 ( https://patriotpost.us/articles/43531 ).

Yes–a major political party openly seeks to outlaw an opinion. You will not be allowed to say that “Climate Change” is anything but gospel truth.

How they plan to square this with the First Amendment is anybody’s guess, but they don’t seem to be overly troubled by that consideration. Maybe it isn’t a consideration. Maybe they reckon that Hillary’s Supreme Court appointments will allow them to do anything and everything they please.

So if you’re sitting around waiting for The Righteous Candidate–

Gee, thanks. I hope it makes you feel good.

What the Devil is This?

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Image result for images of crooked hillary

Hillary Clinton has given a speech in which she denounced some newly-discovered “alt-right” conspiracy masterminded by Alex Jones, Breitbart, and, for all I know, Vincenzo Anthony Pinocchio ( http://www.breitbart.com/big-government/2016/08/25/alt-right-hillary-clinton-supporters-struggle-explain/ ).

No one seemed to know what she was talking about, at the time. But one thing I do know: Hillary Clinton is a criminal.

And here’s another thing I know. If they think I’m going to use their new term that they just dreamed up, they can stick it in their gravitas.

Here is a crook who used her office as Secretary of State to rake in fabulous amounts of money for her alleged “charity,” the Clinton Foundation: the biggest pay-for-play scam in U.S. history. Anyone else would have been tossed into the slammer so fast, it would’ve made her head spin.

But Loretta Lunch–er, Lynch–waved her magic wand and made the indictments go away.

Hillary Clinton is a criminal.

That’s all we need to know.