My Newswithviews Column, Aug. 27 (‘Moral Enhancements–in Your Drinking Water)

I just can’t get over the “ethics” professor’s call for “moral enhancements” to be added to our drinking water.

‘Moral Enhancements’—in Your Drinking Water

And you thought Bob Hope was kidding.

This is where “science” takes us after it’s divorced from God. It’s just another expression of Original Sin. And the university is the rash it’s broken out in.

If you can’t treat the root cause, you might as well treat the symptoms. We can’t cure Original Sin; but we can defund the colleges.

 

‘Confess Your Climate Sins’? Really?

Bob Hope was absolutely right about Democrats.

Dig this–assorted liberal not-very-useful idiots “confessing” their “climate sins.” I drove to work when I coulda took the bus! I flew out to the West Coast to visit my son! Sheesh, couldn’t he find a wagon train? I can’t stop eating meat! (https://dailycaller.com/2019/09/18/nbc-news-climate-confessions/) I mean, is this pathetic, or what?

The venue for this celebration of the abject is NBC Nooze and its “Climate Confessions” project. News? This is supposed to be news? Is this what a news agency does? Really? Since when? Oh–since they stopped reporting news. Is this what our “free and independent” press has come to?

I wouldn’t be surprised to discover that the “confessers” were either actors hired for the purpose or else entirely fictional characters. But I’m sad to say they probably wouldn’t have to do that. There are probably enough real zombies out there to provide all the “confessions” any Far Left power-grabber could want.

Meanwhile, Climate Change presidential wannabe Bernie Sanders (“Socialism been very, very good to me!”) spends $300,000 per month on private jet travel. But going back to the lifestyle of a tenth-century Scottish peasant is for us, not them.

Ooh! It’s time for my own confession! Almost forgot to confess my climate sins. Wanna make sure my mind is right, when they take over and open up the gulags. So here it is–

Y’know, I just can’t decide what’s the most shameful aspect of this story. Can you?

‘Prof Seeks Funds for Zombie Study’ (2015)

Bob Hope hits the bullseye.

Yes–now you can go to collidge, and run of a $150,000 debt, to study… zombies.

Prof Seeks Funds for Zombie Study

The fact that there’s no such thing as zombies doesn’t seem to deter anyone. College students study a lot of things that don’t exist and never have. Unless you define “white privilege” as the privilege of being blamed for everything and having to pay for entitlements to Democrat voting blocs.

Our universities–making America dumber by the day.

Coming Soon: Robot Authors?

Image result for images of robot writing book

“AI [‘Artificial Intelligence,’ a mythical thing] can now write fiction and journalism,” announced The Guardian (https://www.theguardian.com/books/2019/mar/25/the-rise-of-robot-authors-is-the-writing-on-the-wall-for-human-novelists). Big deal. Robots replacing zombies.

But actually The Guardian article is quite critical. What the computers doing this work are, says the report, are “giant automated plagiarism machines” which regurgitate themes and expressions boiled down from thousands of articles and stories written by humans. It should be called Artificial Stupidity. You can see that when it’s given the opening line of a classic novel by, for example, George Orwell or Jane Austen, and then goes on to tack onto it a lot of half-baked twaddle. I wonder how they’d continue A Tale of Two Cities after Charles Dickens’ immortal opening words, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times…” Click the link above to see just how badly they fail. Violet Crepuscular could do better.

But journalism! Now we’re getting somewhere. They’re already robots–why pay them, when you can replace them? Whatever the news item they’re writing about, all they have to do is attack Donald Trump, say it’s all his fault, and throw in a few words about racism and gender identity. And presto, you’ve got journalism.

Robots can’t write classic novels, but they can do modern journalism.