Tag: foolish intellectuals

So It’s Not Satire… REPRINT

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From August 15, 2016

Hey! Remember this?    How we defenseless taxpayers of America paid over $400,000 to some idiot “professor” to pioneer “feminist glaciology” and “the connection between gender and glaciers”?

So you thought I was kidding yesterday when I wrote “Physics goes P.C.”? Well, so did I–but now I’m not so sure. I mean, here we’ve got a “feminist political ecology and feminist postcolonial approach” to the study of glaciers. What the blazes does that mean?

We are asked–if not ordered–to believe in “science” as the ultimate arbiter of truth. If “science” says it ain’t so, then it ain’t so: sayonara, Book of Genesis. And if “science” says it’s so, then it’s so: come on in, feminist glaciology! Here, you can sit down right here, between Climate Change and Evolution.

Is what we call “science” even science anymore?

If you say yes, lots of luck trying to prove it.

 

Another book That Dont make No Sentse!! REPRINT

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Image result for images of bogart as sam spade

From April 20, 2018

 

I reely hate To reed books Becose reeding “it” is Racist but i tryed to Reed “This” one becose a Musslum he rote it!! i dint espect It “to” be intresting becose it was abote “a” bird The Maltees Falkin thare was Some kind Of bird “on” the cuvver but I reddit becose the guy whoo rote It “he” is a Musslum named Dashel Mohamet.

Hear at Collidge we has now be Interllecturals so we dont Reely has got to reed no books but this “heer” book it didnt Make No sentse!!! I seen thru it rihght aweighy! It was all abote This guy Sam Spayed and i thinked thats a Funny “name” becose My father he keeeps sayin i shuld ouhght to get Spayed but this hear guy “he is” a Privet Eiye and that “is” two mutch like A Cop! so wye wuld i evver whant “to be” Spayed i dont like himb!!!

and I kepped whaiting to reed “some” Musslum stuph but thare Wasnt anny!!! Jist al this Racist stopid stufff abote some “bird” i think it had Maltees in it and i lyke Maltees as mutch “As Any” boddy expesally wen I amb whaching a Movie but I dont know “Why” any “boddy” wuld whant to Wrihght a hole book about Maltees in a burd!!!! it is a fragrent ixample of Wite Prifflidge!! and I assked my Self waht kind Of Musslum “is” Dashel Mohamet anny weighy???

so I diddnt whant to reed anny moar it was Making my Moth Antenners hurt somthing offal!!! it Maid me hongry too and i diddnt has no jim sox so I had to eet a Bo Tie insted! I dont think Ties thay wil evver replase jim sox!

Lets go On A Dieit!! REPRINT

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From May 10, 2019

Yeasterday we hadded a spacial Lexture in Nothing Studdies abote Dieits and “Haow” yiu shoodnt “eeat” nothing whith Attems in it! Becose themb Attems thay gett “mixed” tagether “and” That maikes themb into Mollycules and thenn Anny Thing it Can “hapen” jist abote al of It all Bad!!!!

It terns Out thare “are” Mollycules in Meet and Vejtibbles and themb Mollycules thay are watt maikes yiu Fat and maikes yiu aslo Whatch Fox News!!! Butt i was Feeeling Releaved becose yiu can stil eet jim sox and hankerchiffs thare isnt no Mollycules in thare!!! But then the Lexturer she sayed “i Hait to telll yiu this butt thare is Attems in pracktally Evry Thing and Attems thay meene Mollycules!!”!

and then somb Eaval whyte Soupremassist he wispered “O Yeah?? then how comb she her is so freekin Fatt??? she must waigh 3 hunderd powneds!!! butt” we herd himb so six of us wee beet himb up!!! Aslo now he hasto “go” to Sencertivatty Traning becose he is Aginst Divercity!!!!! We try not to lett enny Fashists into Nothing Studdies but thay “keep” sneeking “in”!” and maiking biggit speach!!!

Wel somb of Us we was whirryed yiu coodnt “eat” nothing at al becose amlost “Evvry” Thing its got Attems in “it” but that is OK afteral becose The Lexturer “she” toled us she cood cell us “theese” hear Pills witch yiu can take and “thay” “pre-vent” the Attems fromb buntching tagether “And” maiking Mollycules!!! So natcherly we al byed themb Pills so now we are “Saif” fromb Mollycules!!!!! It was a Close Cawl thuohgh!!!!!!

Rushdoony on ‘Invisible Rulers’

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When R.J. Rushdoony wrote this essay, thirty years ago or so, the Western intellectual mind (pardon the oxymoron) had not yet degenerated to “your truth, my truth, no truth.” But as he so often did, he saw exactly where it was heading and could tell you exactly where it came from.

https://chalcedon.edu/resources/articles/invisible-rulers

There’s a lot of meat to this essay, but stick with it–because it tells us how we got here and points us back to God.

Postmodern poop that rests on such philosophical gems as “I is reality” has no future.

We Has Lotts of Ginders!!!!

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Gender chaos leads to societal chaos - Yellowhammer News

[Editor’s Note: Yipes! I got so caught up in my book today, I completely lost track of the time and now I’m late. Almost forgot this week’s Joe Collidge. Don’t everybody howl forlornly at once.]

Whel, whoo cairs about that stopid guy And “his” stopid boock??? Heer at Collidge we got “moar” impotent things To Thinck abote!!!!

We jist fowned Out “fromb” Harverd and that is a Big Fantsy Unavoracity that nhow yiu “can has” A diffrint Gender evry Day!!!!! How grate “is” thatt??? And iff enyboddy Elsse thay get yore Pro-nown wrawng thay “are” “In” Big Trubble!!!!!!

I taiked alll themb Moth Hoarmoan shot to Tern me Into “a” wimmin and nhow It terns out I awlreddy Amb! a wimmin jist becose I saye so!!!!! In facked Harverd thay say yiu can Be “moar” Than one ginder at “the” Saimb Tyme!!!!!! Eevin gender thatt thay got “nl” naims foar Yet!!!

So i amb a “man” And aslo “a” wimmin and aslo sumb-thing Elsse!!!! Mayby i shood caul My Selff “a Schwoomin” oar “a Mumman!”!” And aslo mayby i better Stay Aweiyh fromb wautter or i mite Get pregganint!!!!! And iff yiu eet Rice Chex yiu mite “start” monstrewaiting!!!!! Is that Coool or watt???

This heer it “is” jist so Grate!!!!! Nhow we can Maik Up niew Pro-Nowns that no boddy thay evver herd Of “beafoar” and get themb punnished for Miss Gindering!!!! Didd yiu know “that” Miss Gindering it cain axully kill A Trans Person dedd??!! Thats watt thay say At Harverd!!! so it mussed be triu!!

Sow nhow i amb goingto Fyned Out “moar” Genders i can be,, thare Mussed “be” hunderds of themb Out Thare!!!!!!!!

Their Is Too ET’s!! REPRINT

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From April 2, 2016

This moning my freinds had to beet up this guy he was sayin bad things about Sceince! Hear at collidge us interllecturals we dont allou nobody to say nothin bad abuot Sceince!

This stopid guy he was sayin how Can yiu have a Sceintiffic Study of something wehn thare aint nothin to study? He was takling abuot the Grate Sceintiffic Study by the Grate Aurstrallia Natoinal Unavarsity they sayed the Reeson sceintists cant find no Alien Beans is that thay must of All dyed out and we jist missed them and he sayed Ohboy, now thay makin Studies that got no Datta and thay cal theyselfs sceintistes so that is whiy we beet him up! Yiu Cant be sayin stuff lyke that in Collidge! So us Tollerant perssons we got togethher and beet him up for not bean Tollerant.

And anyhow he is Dead Rwong!!! Becose I sees them Alians al the tyme ever sinse thay frist started Shootin Me up ful of Moth hormoans, i just seen a ET this moning rihgjt hear on Campus nere whare they has the Jackalope nests.
Acterally the Alien it was kind of scarey, it had three Eyes and tentracles like a Octerpuss, i seen it rihgjt affter I eat a peace of Rug and my prefesser he sayed Uh-oh “yiu shuldnt of done” that becose it had Carpet Cleener on it. I dunno. it tasted alright but latter i fellt kind of funny.

So the Point is thare reely is Space Alients and i seen them and thay hasnt al dyed out and becume Extinked. Thay is hear Among us now!

Joe Collidge in Jale! REPRINT

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Image result for images of in jail monopoly squareFrom February 10, 2017

I amb writing “this” in jale and ohboy am i uppset!

This here mourning in Gender Studies 202 thay teached us that a hole lot of Protest peple thay going to Moon that Trump Tawer “in” Chickago to make him re-lease his tax inframation! i did not know yiu had to lease your tackses but We al thinked “it” is a grate Idea “to” Moon Trump Tawer it wil make him “do” waht we Want and then he wil not “be” Pressidint no more and so We can “have” Hillery like she shuld of beeen Pressidint anyhow!

Wel of corse this Collidge is not in Chickago and we dont have no Trump Tawer ether but i stil wantted “to” Moon so as to Protest Donold trump so naturly i whent over to Our own Town Hall and i Mooned that Lollypop lady thay got out thare “on” the streat Corner becose she “looks” like she Voted for trump!!  Man was it cold! i jist abote Froze my Hynie offf!

And wuld yiu beleeve it?? Neckst thing i Know thare is Cops al over me! And thay went and Throwed me in jale! and thay didnt Lissen whan I toled them to Look on the Intranet and then thay Wuld see that we Interllecturals we has al “got” a Rihght to Moon anytime wee want, this Juggde in Mary Land he sayed Mooning is “a form of Artistic Expresion pretected by The Forst Amenment” ( http://thehill.com/blogs/in-the-know/in-the-know/317873-hundreds-plan-to-moon-trump-tower-in-protest ). Thare Is No Way i shuld get throwed in Jale for doing a Artistic Expresion!!! I mean thare is payinting and Scrulpture and Music and aslo Mooning!

Wel thay sayed i culd has One fone call so i “caled” my Prefesser and “he” come over and sayed he wuld ogranise A Prottest to get me Out “of” jale and so i givved him This assay yiu are Reeding now and it looks “like” i has got to spend To Night in this jale sell butt at leeast it Is warmer than My prefesser’s Tool Shedd!i gess i wuld be al rihght now exsept That Lollypop lady she come in And hit me on my Moth Antenners she is a Dirty fashist and a Biggit and that reely hurted me!!!

Whye we warship Pressadint Obamma REPRINT

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Image result for images of statue of obama

Well HA HA HA!! We has thunk up a prottest “now” that is goin to forse Donold Trump “to” stepp down and flea the contry!!!

Hear at Our Collidge we Has put up a stattue “of” Pressidint Obamma witch us Interllecturals we warship “Evty” day! and dont yiu “go saying” we has got “a” religon now becose Us Interllecturals we “know thare” isnt no sutch thing as God but Pressadint Obamma he “is” a Hire Being mutch Supreriar to ordrinay Humins and you wate and See “he” wil Live Fourevver! In fact he “is like” King Arther he is going to Come Back and be Our Pressadint agian when “the” contry It kneads him most!!!!

I has askd My prefesser if i Can be “a preest” of Pressidint Obamma’s stattue and then I wil eat Bugs and evry Day i wil Burn insents to him And chante them Holey words “Barrack Hoosine Obamma Mmm-Mmm-Mmm!! And the stattue It wil here me Chanting and it Wil “grohw” more Powerfull and make Big Mojoe and verry Soon “chace Donold” Trump clere Out of The Contry!!! and Then he wil Come Back to the Witehouse and aslo Hillary she wil Be The Goddass!

And it istnt No religon becose Pressadint Obamma he “is reel”!!!

And now i has got to deside waht Kind of Bugs to eate thay telll me Crickits thay go goood whith Jim Sox in sauce!

From January 14, 2017

A Mergeancy Allert ‘from’ Joe Collidge REPRINT

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Now looke waht yiu nogood dirtty repulbickans gone and Done!! i Has jist fouwned out “that” iff That stinkin “Donold Trumpp” he gets Eleckted Instid “of” Hillary, Barbra Strysand she going to leeave “the” Contry and Not come back no More!!! ( http://www.dailywire.com/news/8740/streisand-ill-leave-country-if-trump-wins-michael-qazvini )

Waht kinder contry “wil” itt bee With Out her?! it Is reely Too horryble evin To “think” abuot! And aslo A lot “of” otther Super Smart and boutifull Cellerbites thay wil “aslo” Leeve! Like Woppy Gold Berg and Revrind Al Sharptin and “evin” Brenda Bungsniffer and Chriss Fungus and a hole “bunch” of othhers whoos Names “I” cant spel. Its jist awffle! And my Prefesser “he” sayes The contry It Wil Cap Size it “wil” Flipp rihght Over then We al goin To Die!!!!

So Congrous thay shuld Quick make “it” aginst the Law Not “to” vote four Hillary and yiu get Shot iff yiu dont,, IT IS “THE” ONELY WAY TO PERTECT FREEEDOM IN THIS CONTRY!!!!

From August 30 2016

Joe Collidge’s Movie Review REPRINT

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Image result for images of idiot man dressed as woman

I seen This movie yestadday it “was” in Gender Studies class and it was jist apsolotely grate!! only i cant rebember what “it” was callled. Aslo i cant rember whoo was in it but It was abuot some guy he Got his self turned into A wimmin and al Her fammly thay got Mad at waht she done And “so” thay made a Lot “of” micro-gresions aginst Her! and thatt was becose thay al ware no-good stopid christins.

Wel “let me” tel yiu that storey it got me good and mad! Wen yiu get yore selff turned into a Wimmin evryboddy has got To afirm yiu and cellerbrate waht yiu done! Hear at Collidge us Interllecturals we has maid sure “that” noboddy even aloud to Say annything hatful wen “someboddy” thay gett a Gender Change and if yiu dosnt say It “is” goood yiu gets Put inta Diversity Training!!!

Gee i wish I culd rember Waht was the Tietal of “that” movie but when thay showed The tietal thare was Somthing rong with My Moth Antenners thay was itchin somthing feerce and i jist keeped scrachin and scrachin butt “it” wuldnt stopp!! Wel yiu cann fiend out More abuot “this” movie Iff yiu go to Collidge and sine up For Gender Studies becose fromm Now “on” evryone hear has got “to” see it and wee “wil” make It a “New Rule” that yiu has to say its Goood or else yiu bein hatful “and” Intollerent and we wil beet yiu up Until yiu larn How to bee “more” Tollerent and aslo Incluesieve!

So dont yiu Dare “miss” This movie!

And nowe My antenners thay stil ichin I got to gett Out “of” hear.

From 2016