Tag: foolish intellectuals

Liberal Objects of Worship

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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We have learned a lot about liberals’ religion, these last couple of days, and from the most unimpeachable sources. It might be worthwhile, trying to impeach them.

From an “ecosexual” art professor we learn that the earth is capable of amours with human beings, and that these dalliances will likely save the planet. From what, we are not told. But I’ll bet you never look at rocks and trees again the same old way.

And from a movie star we learn that Mother Nature presides over it all, is a registered Democrat and huge Hillary fan, and is capable of slinging hurricanes around like frisbees when she feels the need to punish those who don’t believe in Man-Made Climbit Change.

No wonder they don’t need the real God. No wonder they sneer at those who read the Bible.

So it’s Mother Nature, the earth itself, and–what? How do they complete their trinity?

The third person of the liberal trinity is the State. And Science.

But wait a minute! You can’t have a trinity with four persons in it, instead of only three!

You can if you’re a liberal.

How We save The Plannit!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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Wow did we have “a” lexture today!! Our Gender Studies class we got a geusst lexture from a Eco Sexural Prefesser she comed al “the” way From Calliforma and she toled us How to Save The Plannit by “makeing” love Whith the Erth!!! and i caint hardly waighht to Try it!

She sayed her and her Pratner thay do it al “the” tyme!! thay gets nekkid and roles Around in Mud and thay Lick the Treees and get The Plannit al exyted like and That is how thay wil get the Erth to have “more” Self Esteam or somthing!! but affter a wile it was Kindof “hard” to folo becose she was So Interllectural i culdnt Hardly figger out “whatt” she was saying that “is” the sine of a reel Interllectural if you can unnder-stand them eazy then it is Not true Interllectural!

I dont know wye but lissining “to” al “this” It made me jist tirribble hungry And i culdnt Help it and thare wasnt Nothing “elsse” to eet so i taked Off “my” shoo and than i started eeting my Sock and it was embarasting reely but she Seen it and she gived me a grate “bit” slime and sayed “wel i am Glad to” see thare “is Somboddy hear” that he is Saving The Plannit “rihght now by Re-cycalling” his Sox!!! and i jist abote Meltted! when she smyled like That!

and now i Has got “to” stop riting and go “out” and Save The Plannit some more!!!

Even More Incredible: ‘Have Sex with the Earth’

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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[Warning: This news item is not only ridiculous, but also rather filthy. I report it because it’s necessary to know what those on the dark side are up to.]

I heard this on the radio today and didn’t believe it. But it’s true.

The head of the art department at UC Santa Cruz–here we are again in “higher education”–who describes herself as “ecosexual,” says people should “have sex with the Earth” to, well, Save the Planet. (https://www.thecollegefix.com/post/36330/) Let one quote from this professor suffice: she claims to be able to teach you how to “climax with the planetary clitoris.”

How much do you suppose she gets paid for this? Oh, the tuition dollars! Talk about getting your money’s worth of “education”!

Is there any sane reason at all for these colleges and universities to continue to exist? Is there even any silly reason to shell out thousands and thousands of dollars to send your sons and daughters there?

I just can’t wait to hear those reasons.

Book Review: ‘Why Socialism Works Good’

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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I have accepted an assignment from Chalcedon to review Bernie Sanders’ Guide to Political Revolution. The sacrifices I make for this ministry!

I am sure Bernie will only be following in the footsteps of a book I read many years ago: Why Socialism Works Good, by Dr. Helza Poppin, an associate professor of Nothing Studies at Pimento University (“P.U., P.U., we’re all for you!”).

“Once you makes it against the law to make a profit,” Poppin wrote, “socialism just naturally happens. Them profits they drives up prices and also they encourages people to be greedy. People they should only work for altruistic reasons like I do, for the pure growth of knowledge and also knowing things. So you see if everybody they work for free then they can all get everything they need from the government for free, and you do away with money like totally. This is very awesome.”

The book dropped out of the market when it was revealed that Dr. Poppin actually was being paid what a dean at P.U. called “an exorbitant salary, and not worth a penny of it” and that she did not, in fact, work for pure love of increasing the fund of human knowledge. Published by Pablum Books, now out of business, a new copy of Why Socialism Works Good sold for $75.99 and a used one is virtually unobtainable.

But I’ll betcha Bernie Sanders read it.

The futchure Is Trans Gender!!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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Us interllecturals we has reely got “to” Luagh at al yiu ordrinary dum peple “getting” al Bent out of shap by Manditory Trans Gender and LBTGQY Eddacation in the pubic schools!! Yiu are Too stopid to “know” a goood Thing “whenn” yiu see It!

We teling yiu now The Futchure it is Trans al the weighy!!! Thare isnt no Poynt in yore fiting it or argruing abote It becose The smartest Interllecturals in al the Collidges we has figgored it out and It is going To hapen!!!

Al the boyes thay are goingg to be transed “into” girls and al The grils thay going “To Be” transed Into boyes!!! This wil make Socile Jutstus hapen! it Is “so” riddicless for al yore littal Chilldran to be Crying becose thay afrayed of being Chainged Into somthing Else!! Heck i been tryinTo get “my” sexx chainged four Months and Months that Is wheye i get me shot up whith al them Moth Hormoans but al I got “To” shoe four it “so faar” is my Moth Antenners anyhow it is Four Thare Own Goood so shut up alreddy!!!

Geting yore Sex chainged becose wee Toled yiu to it is 1} the weighy to assurt yore Indypendanse and 2} yiu awlyays shuld oght to do “whatt” Us Interllecturals we telll yiu to do and 3$ It wil finely get rid of Trans Phobia ontce and four al becose thenn Evry Boddy “thay wil” be Trans!!!

Rebember!! The Futchure “it” is alyays in The Futchure!!!

No more Canfedrate Names Alloued!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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We lets see “that” stopid gye Lee “get” Out of this one!!

See, now he gots “to” change his Name becose It is one of them Canfedrate Notzi names and “iff” he Keeps On using it than he willl be gilty of hat speach!! Like it”s the Same thing “as” being named Hittler whitch is aslo a Canfedrate Notzi name! and it wil affend evry one Whoo sees it Or heres it! and he “has got” To erace it from al his stopid boooks too!!

Jist let himb “trye” to fined a New Name for his self that Isnt some kined of Micro Grecian! If he cal his self Tom welll thats a Notzi name tooo! And he cant Take no Minorty Name neether and cal his self Peeair or Toshiro or Mbemby becose than it Wuld be Cultchurel Apropiation whitch its not alloued!!! so now he “cannt” wright nothing Or say nothing he jist “have to” Shutt Up!!!! Becose whattever he sayes it makes him “a” Whight Stuprimassist and Auntifa wil come and get him! Ha ha ha!!!

Meenwile at the Collidge we getting Rid “of” all Whight Notzi names of Streets and billdings and boooks untill thare isnt None of them lefft! We thunk this Up becose we are Intrallecturals and al yiu Ordrinary dum peple yiu has got to Obay us it “is” fore yuor own Goood!!!!

Flash! The Eclipse was… Racist?

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Image result for images of racist eclipse path of totality

I thought this was a joke when I heard it on the radio today, but I should’ve known better.

Today’s solar eclipse was… well, racist or something, according to a professor (what else?) at the Brooklyn Law School. Snopes.com rushed in to defend her (http://www.snopes.com/eclipse-racist/), pointing out that she never actually used the word “racist” in her essay (published in The Atlantic). The lefties at Snopes chided us dumb conservatives for not being able to understand such a clever and witty bit of intellectual drivel.

What she did say about the eclipse was that “along most of its path, there are almost no black people.” Huh? Why would you even bring that up? What possible significance could it have for anybody but a twit?

Would you say our intrallecturals are obsessed by race?

And people pay damned good money to have their sons and daughters “educated” by these dingbats.

Fooling the Experts: A Great Shakespeare Hoax

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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In 1796 the word in London was, “Holy cow! A brand-new Shakespeare play!” Yes, a long-lost play by William Shakespeare, Vortigern and Rowena, was set to open at the newly-expanded Drury Lane Theatre. And everybody knew it was the real thing… because all the experts said so (http://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/to-beor-not-the-greatest-shakespeare-forgery-136201/).

Opening night. By the time Act III roles around, the actors in the play have come to realize that they’re performing a hoax, and a rather clumsy one at that. They play the next two acts for laughs. The audience divides between believers and those who are mighty sore about having been had, and fistfights break out. The theater management has to scuttle all plans for any subsequent performances of this turkey.

But all the experts swore it was the real McCoy. There were some who wondered if Shakespeare might have been 11 years old when he wrote this, or drunk, or impaired in some other way–but even they swore the play was genuine.

In fact, it was a forgery cooked up by 19-year-old William Henry Ireland, whose motive was to show all those people, especially his father, who said he was a dullard. The Smithsonian article will tell you how he did it. And he got tired of trying to keep up the pretense, so he admitted what he’d done–and still there were those who refused to believe the play was a hoax. Mr. Ireland refused to believe his son had the brains to concoct such a scam.

The point is, all the cognoscenti, all the Shakespeare-wallahs who should’ve known better (with only a very few exceptions, who were shouted down), were completely taken in by this. It took a bunch of not-expert actors to tear away the curtain and reveal the humbug behind it.

If the play’s authenticity were being debated today, its defenders would surely be proclaiming, “The science is settled, so shut up!”

Tare down Them Moniumints!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Image result for images of doughboy monument highland park nj

Prefesser Ginder in the Gay Studdies Deptt she give A fantatstic Speach yeasterday and she “got us”al worked Up!! It was al abote How Gay peple and Trans peple and Muslins and peple From mexxico thay was fownding Americka but them Rushins thay hacked “it” and it Started “the” Sivvle War! I thinked i knowed al abote “the Civvle War” it was the War that “had” M*A*S*H** in it butt i didnt know it was How Wite peple it is OK to hat them thay tuck over And “that is” how Americka it got turned in-to the Evil roten cuontry that it “is” now!!! and she sayed we got to make Socile Jutstis by taring Down all them Canfedret moniumints that Wite peple thay putt “up” to keeep Slavry! and she sayed we got To “be” carfull becose the Town aruond the Collidge it is ful of Knotsies!!! there is, like,yknow, ten Thowsend Knostsies in it!!!

And than i amb sorry “to” say somme of Us we got “in” trubble becose we runned out to reck them Canfedret moniumints rihght hear On Campas and the pressadint of the Collidge he got so mad at us!! And he piked up “a ” Bull Horn and he yelled At us “Yiu stopid idjits yiu puled down The ” wrong Statchues! Wel we made a missteak and we did pulll down the Wrong ones, “yiu damfools, thoze was the Statchues of Lennon and Casstro and Marks and Magrat Sannger!!! Like “we” was So imbarasssed!!! and now we got “to” Putt them up agin! and the Collidge pressadint he yeled At Us some more becose it turns out thare Isnt no Canfedret Statchues hear On Campas!

So now we got To put Up some Canfedret Statchue jist so we Can tare it Down agin! We didnt know Who to Make it a Statchue of, like, witch Canfedret it auhght To Be but Finely we “setled” on a Statchue of some guy his name was Ritcherd Simmons or somthing Like that! and the Monny it has got to come Out Of the Stodent Playdoh Fund!

I Buyed A Time Mashine!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

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Wel i has reely did it now!!! I amb going “to” Change The Whorld!!

To day this hear guy he mayjers in Physick and he “says to”” me do i Want to “buy” a Time Mashine! and i say “butt it is jist a Card Bord Box!” and he say “no It only Looks “like a” Card Bord Box acterly it is a Time Mashine and yiu can Travel In Time, i wil Selll it to yiu for jist $5 dollars and than yiu “can” Travel Inta the Futchure!! wel i didnt Have no $5 dollars whitch is becose of Inequallity and i think reel hard and i says Butt “how do i know It werks??” and he sayed Simpal, jist clime in and close It Up afftar yiu and wen yiu come out agian it will be the Futcher!!” and i say OK butt how wil i know its reely the Futchure??

So he shoes me His whatch and sayes “Look waht Time is it now?” butt i am not so Good At “telling Time,” thay didnt teech me it in Gender Studies so i had to ask and he toled me It “is now” 2:12 p.m. jist go in the Box and close it” whitch Is whatt i done and thare I amb in Side the Box and i thohght i was In It “kind of” long but than he sayed “Now opin the Box and clime out and see waht Time it is now” and Holy Cow! “It is 2:15 P.m. yiu has travvled 3 minits inta The Futchure!!”

Wel finely he selled it to me for jist #1 dollar and 26 scents witch was al I had butt now I can travvle into the Futchure!!!! I whanted to Thank him but than he “went Away” reel fast!

And So hear’s waht i amb going to Do!! I amb going to travvle Inta The Futchure and Stop Donold trump from evver being Borne so he cant get Elecktid Pressadint and Hillery she “wil be” Our Pressadint insted!!!

and al them dum and stopid peple whoo vhoted for him Thay wil get a reel supprise that thay wont like!!!