‘The Liberal Chronicle of Narnia: “The Earth Priestess Brings Social Justice to the Workers”‘ (2016)

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Here I go again with archaic political notions. I just can’t help myself–can’t drum up even the tiniest flicker of desire to get woke.

Hey! What would you get if liberals rewrote C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia?

You’d get a load of schiff like this.

The Liberal Chronicle of Narnia: ‘The Earth Priestess Brings Social Justice to the Workers’

It’s liberals, so of course the White Witch is the hero and everything bad is good, everything good is bad. That’s being with it! That’s being in tune with the times.

Proceeds from the sale of Earth Priestess will go to pay bail for rioters.

‘This Just In (Some Very Hot News Flashes)’ (2015)

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This little blog scooped all the Big Media on these red-hot news stories, three years ago. In fact, the Big Media have yet to catch up.

https://leeduigon.com/2015/04/01/this-just-in-some-very-hot-news-flashes/

How distressing it is to think we had John Kerry as our secretary of state, and almost had him as our president.

‘Their Fantasies Are Wackier than Mine’ (2011)

I wrote this in 2011; and the saddest thing about it, seven years later, is that none of these wacko leftid fantasies has died out. These are follies that endure like granite.

https://leeduigon.com/2011/09/06/their-fantasies-are-wackier-than-mine/

I really don’t like fantasy as a basis for public policy. Do you?

‘Climate Change Been Very, Very Good to Me!’

If Godzilla were a shopaholic yuppie, even he probably couldn’t match Global Warming guru Al Gore’s carbon footprint.

Gore’s humble, 20-room mansion in the exclusive Belle Meade section of Nashville, according to public records, uses up enough energy in one year to supply an average American home for 21 years (http://www.climatedepot.com/2017/08/02/report-al-gores-home-energy-use-surges-up-to-34-times-the-national-average/). In the year 2016 alone he gulped down enough electricity for 34 average American homes. And last year he scarfed over 60,000 kilowatt hours just to heat his swimming pool–somehow the thought of him swimming is disquieting–enough juice for six average American homes for a year.

I wonder how many thousands, or even millions, of regular people it would take to match the energy consumption of even just the top few Climbit Change bigwigs–Gore, Kerry, Obama, et al.

I wonder why anybody in his right mind still finds any of this Global Warming BS even a little bit credible. Please take a good, hard look at how Gore and his private jet-owning buddies actually live. Do they act like they believe it? Would you believe a fitness guru if he was morbidly obese?

Still, you gotta give him credit: nobody milks scare tactics more profitably than Al Gore. He’s a kazillionaire because of it–and that’s not bad for some jidrool who flunked out of divinity school.

 

Gore Issues Dire Warning of… Well, He Won’t Say

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Timed nicely to accompany the release of his new Global Warming movie, Gimme More Money, former divinity school flunkout Al Gore showed up in The Late, Late Show this week to warn of a “challenging” event which Americans will have to face sometime in the next few months (https://www.teaparty.org/al-gore-ominously-warns-americans-prepare-challenging-event-happening-soon-video-255113/).

He forgot to mention what that event was going to be, and the show host never thought to ask him. All we are told is that it’s going to be real hard and not at all nice.

Could anything be more childish? What is this guy’s emotional age–seven? This goes right back to the playground: “You think your new model airplane is so hot! Ha, it’s nothin’! Why, my dad’s gonna get me a model that makes yours look like a lot of crap, you’ll just about drop dead when you see it!” And then when you ask what is this marvel, you get the answer, “I ain’t tellin’!”

Will it be a plague of locusts? An asteroid impact? A bunch of Democrat senators suddenly stabbing the president to death? A Supreme Court ruling outlawing masculinity?

Al ain’t tellin’.

But that’s okay, ’cause we ain’t listenin’.

A Not-so-Useful Idiot

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That would be Al Gore–former vice president, presidential also-ran, Climbit Change zillionaire, and world-class hypocrite. If you’ve ever wondered how Al managed to flunk out of divinity school, his recent speech at the EcoCity World Summit, in Australia, should make it clear to you.

Addressing his fellow dorks, Gore likened their campaign against imaginary Global Warming and Climbit Change to historical crusades against slavery and apartheid and for women’s suffrage and “gay rights” (http://www.climatedepot.com/2017/07/13/gore-compares-climate-fight-to-slavery-gay-rights-apartheid-at-aussie-summit/).

So “gay rights” is this high moral aspiration? Not according to the Bible it isn’t. No wonder this guy flunked out of divinity school.

Other speakers at the fraud-fest equated government action on Climbit Change with the achievement of “gender and social equity.” Like, the Climbit she’s a-changin’… so we gotta have a lot of new pronouns for a lot of new genders!

The Godless, and those who wish to act as gods themselves, don’t even make sense anymore. For some reason, their insistence that there’s no such thing as objective truth, and that a text can only mean whatever the reader thinks it means, has led them into a vast thicket of irrationality. Do they even suspect how nutty they sound?

Of course not.

Al Gore’s Religious Snake Oil

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Don’t you love it when liberals who defend abortion and crusade for homosexual parodies of marriage suddenly start telling you how to be a Christian?

And don’t you wish Democrats who fail in their bids for the White House would just dry up and blow away?

Thanks to reader “Unknowable” for tipping us off to this latest Third Commandment violation by former presidential also-ran Al Bore. I mean Gore: sorry for the typo, but it’s too true to delete.

Hyping the release of his new Global Warming scare-fest movie, zillionaire Al says he speaks for God when he demands we turn our civilization inside-out to fight that devil, Climbit Change (http://www.jewsnews.co.il/2017/06/11/liberal-goon-al-gore-says-g-d-told-him-to-fight-global-warming.html). We have, he says, “a moral imperative” to do what he says… incidentally making him even richer.

(*Sigh* I was so happy writing about yellow cardinals. Why don’t these people just shut up?)

I don’t believe it’s possible anymore for a leftid to speak God’s name without taking it in vain. I am reminded of Bill Clinton lugging around that big old Bible in between trysts with Monica Lewinsky in the Oral Office. Oops, should be Oval Office. Just can’t seem to type today.

This is the same false prophet and B.S. merchant Gore who predicted that New York would be like Daytona Beach by 2015. How many predictions does he have to get wrong before we laugh him off the stage? This is a guy who looks into a mirror when he prays.

And this is what a sinful people gets by way of leadership. It’s God’s way of telling us we’d better clean up our act.

Global Warming Zillionaires

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An international cabal organized by Al “$$$” Gore, the Energy Transitions Commission, wants the nations of the world to fork over $15 trillion (!) to fight imaginary Global Warming.

But don’t be alarmed. They propose to collect it in mere $600 billion increments over the next twenty years ( http://dailycaller.com/2017/04/25/al-gores-new-group-demands-15-trillion-to-fight-global-warming/)

Here in New Jersey their Global Warming has been freezing our butts off for the past few days. Never mind–“The Science is settled, there’s no debate,” etc.

How much of this enormous amount of money is going to stick to their fingers? “Global Warmin’ been very, very good to me!”  And what good things won’t get done because $15 trillion wasn’t available to do them?

If anybody out there is still taken in by this, I’m disappointed in you.

The truth is that a lot of already rich and powerful people want to become even more rich and powerful, want to install a global government with themselves as lords of the world, and have already been caught lying and cheating innumerable times, trying to make it happen. They haven’t been caught committing murder yet, but don’t rule that out for the future.

They’ve got governments, the Pope, all the big nooze media, the teachers’ unions, and just about all the colleges and universities running before their chariot, believing they’ll all be cut in for a piece of the action once the world government’s in place.

You blocks, you stones, you worse than senseless things…

We have recourse through prayer to an all-mighty and all-righteous God, the judge of all the earth. For the only one who has a right to rule it all is Jesus Christ, King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

These others are but robbers and usurpers. May repentance find them before judgment overtakes them. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Gore: Global Warming Caused Brexit

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Former Vice President Al Gore, who washed out of divinity school, has no more scientific background than your cat, and refuses to debate, now says Global Warming aka Man-Made Climate Change aka B.S. caused both Brexit and the Syrian civil war ( http://www.breitbart.com/video/2017/03/23/al-gore-global-warming-principal-cause-syrian-civil-war-brexit/ ).

Global Warming also caused Wanda Schlumpf to grow a mustache and Jasper Facehead to misplace his riding mower owner’s manual.

Gore, whose alarmist campaign has made him a gazillionaire, says the only way we can survive–or, sometimes, the only way to Save The Planet–is to set up a world government and give it absolute power over even the most minute and intimate details of our lives. Oh, and we should also give it all our money. Otherwise we’re all gonna die.

Brexit couldn’t possibly have been caused by lots of people in Britain resenting the European Union’s high-handed rules and regulations and the London elite’s obsession with becoming Citizens Of The World. Heavens no. Nor could the Syrian civil war have had anything to do with an inherently unstable, artificially constructed state finally cracking up because competing groups of homicidal maniacs couldn’t decide which of them ought to have the right to massacre the others. And certainly the imbecility of EU satraps inviting hordes of Muslim “refugees”–almost all of them able-bodied men of military age–into their countries to raise cane has nothing whatever to do with it, so help me Gore…

Nope–it’s all just some kind of global climatic determinism–

Wait, stop, I’m getting sick. I can’t stand much more of this. When this bag of crap explodes, watch out!

The Liberal Chronicle of Narnia: ‘The Earth Priestess Brings Social Justice to the Workers’

Hundreds of writers have tried to imitate C.S. Lewis’ The Chronicles of Narnia. This is the latest effort.

The “Earth Priestess,” as you may have guessed, is really the White Witch, come back to Narnia to liberate its oppressed minorities from the religious hegemony of Aslan, the Lion. The book is to be published by the Democrat National Committee.

“If you can’t beat ’em, cheat ’em,” said DNC factotum Bill Z. Bubb. He neither confirms nor denies that the author, “Iso Smart,” is cover for the writing team of Al Gore, Chelsea Clinton, and a couple of space aliens.

In this Chronicle, the White Witch overthrows Aslan by exposing him as a transphobic, Islamophobic, micro-aggressing biggit, and the Minority Peoples of Narnia rise up and banish him to the wild wastes of Flyover Country. There is much about this edition of the White Witch that strongly resembles Hillary Clinton: like, for instance, the power her voice has to etch glass.

Mr. Gore was asked how he found the time and inspiration to write a fantasy (if indeed he did write this), when he’s been so busy with the release of his other fantasy–oops, sorry: I mean his non-fiction book–It Would Be Just So Cool to Take All Our Orders from Brussels, co-authored with John Kerry. “I’ve always wanted to improve on Narnia,” he said, “especially in regard to Saving the Planet and promoting feminism and alternative families. I’ve always felt the White Witch–and of course she’s not a witch, that’s just a label that biggits throw around–was the most admirable character in all those books. She represents the female spirituality of The Planet, with Social Justice for all.”

Mind-numbingly creative, The Earth Priestess Brings Social Justice to the Workers comes up with truly unexpected twists–like Dwarf Lives Matter, making the Marsh-Wiggles pay their fair share of taxes, and forcing Centaurs to perform gender re-assignment surgery, to name a few.

Lewis’ Pevensey children having all died in his last Narnia Chronicle, The Last Battle, The Earth Priestess introduces a new group of children from our world–Shawonka, Hussein, Wu Wei Shu, and Glyptodonna, whose two dads are busy campaigning for More Gay Rights. “We explore what American families will look like after one more of our people serves as president,” says Bill Z. Bubb.

All proceeds from the sale of The Earth Priestess Brings Social Justice to the Workers will go to the Clinton Foundation.