Tag Archives: 2020 election

Beto: ‘Call Me Jose’

In his struggle to win the 2020 Democrat nomination for president, Congressman Robert Francis O’Rourke, dba “Beto O’Rourke,” must overcome the double handicap of not being a “minority” and not being a woman: most Dems say you’ve got to be one or the other, or both, to be president of the United States. Those are the most important qualifications for the office.

Well, poor Beto is neither, even though his current alias is intended to get people to think he’s at least part Mexican. But apparently it is not a big enough part, and Beto is doing something about it.

According to a confidential source who is as close to the candidate as it is possible to be without actually merging with him like in that Bergman movie Persona, “Beto is going to change his name, officially, to Jose Jimenez and put it out that his parents came here illegally and he’s, like, an anchor baby and he’d’a been a Dreamer if there were Dreamers when he was born.”

“It was a tough call for him,” said the source. “He had half a mind to have his sex changed and then call himself Maria Chavez, the long-lost cousin of the late Hugo Chavez; but in the long run, he couldn’t face the operation. You know–like he gets his you-know-what removed and still can’t win the nomination, it’s not like they can just duct-tape it back. So the name change is the way to go.”

The next step, said the source, is “to come up with a really catchy slogan. We’re looking at ‘Down With No-Good Stinkin’ White America,’ but we will entertain further suggestions.”

Governed by Idiots

Yesterday, as our nooze media rejoiced and tried to spin it as the start of a whole new age, Democrats took control of the House of Representatives. This is something America should be ashamed of.

Rep. Hank Johnson, Georgia Democrat, gave a speech likening President Donald Trump to “Hitler” and everybody who voted for him, all 63 million of us, to “white supremacists” who are plotting to “destroy democracy.” This earwig was last heard from a couple of years ago, when he voiced his fear that the island of Guam might “tip over, or capsize” if any more Marines were stationed on it.

I don’t know about you, but I resent being governed by morons, who get a damned nice slab of our money for doing it. I don’t like to think of our nation’s laws and policies being made in the lunatic asylum on Capitol Hill. And I don’t like to be reminded that these idiots, these walking cabbages, were actually elected.

For the good of our country, start working now on the 2020 election, to see that the Democrat Party is finally and for all time put out of business, forever.

There is no excuse for voting for a Democrat. Ever.

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