Tag: college makes you stupid

No Moar Preying Indores!!!!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

410+ Teen Sneaking Out Of Window Stock Photos, Pictures ...

Thay “musst” has sumb Grate Collidge in Scott Land! Dam, whiy diddnt We “thinck” “of” It?!?!?

In Scott Land thay doughnt Whant themb fasshist Chrischins preying “by” Bortion Clinix ware yiu See “them” iff yiu Go Thare “foar” a bortion!! Yiu shood nevver has to See Enny Boddy preying unlest “thay Are” preying to Pressidint O’Bumma!!!

Heer At “the” Stodint Soviet, we sentt Themb “our” addvice!!!!

*Taik awhay thair shaydes And venusian blynds so thay Cannt “hyde”!!”

*Evvry Poleese Ociffer out “on” Ptrol, has themb LOOK IN THE WINDERS to try to ketch “sumb Racist preying!!!!!!

*Maik “the” hole citty a No Pray Zoan and pay kids “good monny” for ratting out thare Pairints!!!!

Remememeber wen themb Fasshist Chrischins thay tryed “To” prey “on The syde-wawk “Rite acrost the Streeet fromb “the” bortion clinnick??? Rememember haow We hased To “thro themb awl In Jale”?”?”

Thare whil NEVVER be Socile Jutstice untill EVRYBoDDY has a bortion!!!!!!!!!!

PS, Jist in caset yiu thincked I maid it up–

https://www.breitbart.com/europe/2025/02/27/vance-was-right-praying-at-home-could-be-a-crime-depending-on-who-passes-window-says-scottish-mp/

Now I’ve Heard Everything

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Skeleton X-Ray - Rocks In His Head Stock Illustration ...

Aha, I knew it! Rocks in the head… all the classic symptoms

Ain’t the university grand? Get a load of this from the U. of San Diego:

Racist Geologic Formations of Subjecthood” (https://www.campusreform.org/article/new-geology-study-explains-rocks-can-help-heal-racism/27520).

What? You think that’s just a lot of gobbledygook? Well, then, try this on for size:

Conceptualizing Black Humanity Through Geopoetic Intimacy and Resistance: Memory Making Blah-blah-blah

Or do either of these two make you want to run out and liquidate your bank account so you can enroll at SDU:

Gender Communication (Come on, that’s too easy). Okay, then, this’ll do ya–Critical Whiteness and [Something–who cares?] Practices.

“Rocks heal racism,”

Go ahead, read the article. I challenge you to explain it. If this isn’t the biggest pile of Wock-wock on the Internet… I’ll throw rocks.

Wimmins Is Wimmins!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Monty Python - Happy International Women's Day from the ...

Look heer! This hear It Is “a” pixture Of A Wimmin and awl yiu Fashists “Out thare” yiu can Jist get Bent!!!!

And heer I amb on Satterday insted “of” Sundae becawse “that” doap Lee he nevver “knows” “waht” Day it is!!!!!

So it “is” Up to I, Joe Collidge, to re-mind yiu Awl “that Woak is Woak” and bye this heer tyme Neckst Yeer yiu beter Be Woak oar yhule Be” Sowry”!”!” Doughnt be thincking Darnold Trumpt that he Can “Saive” yiu!!!!

Yes!!! A “man” can Turn into a Wimmin!! And A Wimmin she Can “turN” into “a Man”!” We whil maike It A Law!!!!!!!! I amb In Fayver of a Law that yiu shood awt to has yore Secks chainged evry yeer.

[Waht? Waht say? Im sapposed “to Be” heer Fryday???? Sints wen?? Haow didd I wynde up Heeer on Satterday??]

Egskuze me, i Has got “to Go” and treye “to Fynde” a Callender!!

Fihght For Green Land!!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Greenland's Vivid Landscapes: Raw, Undiscovered, and ...

Hoaw the heck “is he” gunna bild A Casseeno hear??????

Heer “at” collidge we Are whay too Smart to fall “foar” Darnold Trumpt trying To Taik Over Green Land!!!

Evver sinct “it was” dis-cuvverd by “Vykings” trying To Get “to” Minnasoda, Green Land it has “bin” ful of Poler Bares and Seels. Eskamoes hunt themb!!!! Trumpt he Is sayying he woont Let themb “hunt” ennymoar unlest thay Pay himb $$14 dollards foar A Lycinct!!!! He whants To Deestroy Thair Culchut “so he” Can bild “a” Casseeno up thare!!!!

HE MUST BE STOPT!!!! One moar Casseeno and thats “The End” of evvry-Thing!!!!! Casseenoes thay cawze Climbit Change!!!!!!!!!! I kannot Stresst “this” enuff!!!!!!!

(He stil Thingks he “won” The Elexion!! Whaytll he seas “the” “Fynul Voat Coawnt!”:!”!” Rite-in “voats” galoar foar Pressadint Obumma!!!!!! Thenn he Saives “the” Plannit!!!!!!!!

Green Land it shood Not “be” part of The Untied Staites!!!!

Butt shood Amairacka be “Part Of” Green Land??

Waht ‘Is’ A Wimmin??

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Furious woman

This heer “it” “is” a wimmin!

Well! It is Allmost tyme to sneek Hillary in to “the” Wyte Houose “befour” that Fashist Darnold Trumpt he “can” get In Thare!! But first This–!

Thare’s this gye, “he Used” to be govenner of Mary-Land (or was it King of Awestrallyer? who can “re-membber” this Stuff??), he hadded To Go to Congrass and anser Questchins!! And “he” sayed A Verry Wyze Thing!!!!

Thay aksed himb “Waht is a wimmin”? And he sayed “I”m maryed to a wimmin. I has two dawters who are wimmin.” I thngk Sumone aksed himb “Waht “is” a Wimmin?” and That”s haow he ansered!!! He shood of wun A Goaldin Gob for that!!!!

Wen Kamaller Haris she “is” Pressadint thare whill be Fyring Squats for evvryboddy whoo woont Get Behynde The Pogrom”!”!” Then shee Can maik Jobydin Hi Preest Of Obomba!!!!

And thenn We whil Awl fyne “Out” waht Is A Wimmin!!!!!!!

Thayre Affter ‘My’ Fissh!!!!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

Snail Darter Delisted as an Endangered Species

Heer “at” Collidge we hased a Merjintsy Meting of “The” Stodent Soviet to pro-test Darnold Trumpt  and his Planns to wype “out”… The Snale Darter!!!!!!!!!!

I amb appauled and So “is” evvryboddy Elss whoo is Good!! Ownly Bad Peeple (!!!) whant to bild Damns and hydro-thingys witch whill Hurt “the Snale Darter.” It is a fissh!!! And fissh has Rites!!!

In facked I amb pritty “Sure” ouur Fambly used to has a Snale Darter his naimb it was Jonny! The Cat ate himb!!!!!! I was so madd,, I tryed to eet the Cat but he scarched me andd Got A-way!!!! We hadded a gye neckst store he sayed he Cood Bring Jonny back “to” Lyfe butt we diddnt “sea” himb agin affter my ould man payed himb “The” munny!!!!!

Now thayre Saying thare Nevver Was no Snale Darter, it was sorta lyke Santy Claws, or draggins! Never was??? I amb so Gladd (!) that Jonny he nevver lived “to” heer nobody say a Thing “lyke” that!!!!!!!

Ownly Demmocrapts Go ‘To’ Hevvin!!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

See that thare pixture up thare? Thats Pressadint Obomma!!! And that Thing arownd “his” faice, “it is” a Haylo!!!!!!! Yiu know–lyke Ainjils have!!! That is Becawse he “is” Haff a god!!!!!!! The oather haff it “is” Still Hiumin, so he doughnt ware The Haylo “awl that” Tyme!!!

And I hadded a Dreemb lasst “nite” and inn “that” dreemb Pressadint Iguama he spoak “To” “me” and sated “Jo, frumb nhow On ownly Demmocrapts they whil Goe “to” Hevvin wen thay dye AND NO”BODY” ELSS WHIL!!!!!!!!!!”

Up thare in Hevvin thay “are Awlreddy” maikin a Haylo foar Kmalalalala Harris witch she “whil” Ware wen she gets ingorgorated as Pressadint!!! Watt a Day “that” whil Be!!!!!! Politicks of Joy!!!!!!  Politix of Joy it “comes” To Life!!!!!! And evvry Fool that diddnt Voat “foar Her” thay whil awl Be Put IN JAYLE!!!!!

I toled my Femmanist Fysicks Prefesser how I dreembed Of Pressadint Obomma and “he tawlked to” me and she sayed OH WOW!!!! “YIU MUSSED BE A PROFFIT!!!!! Like Goliath oar sumb boddy in the Byble!!!! Thay are goingto see Abuout “givving” me Ackademic Creddit foar “beeing” A Proffit!! Meenwile thay “put up” my Pixture over the cownter at Veggy Burger so I ghess I’mb Kinda Faymiss!!!!!!!!!!

We ‘Are’ Helppin Dizney!!!!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

A Woke Disney

Heer at Collidge, iff yiu doughnt lyke Dizzney moovies,, we “putt” yiu Into Sensertivvaty Traning and yiu Better” come Aruound “in a” Hurry!!!!!!!

Taik that “new Sno” Wyte moovy! Awl themb Haters out thare, dumpping “on” Dizzney And “saying” themb moovies “thay are” Tooo Woak!!!!!!!! Yiou shuddnt Evin “be” aloud to Say That!!! It “is” hat speach!!!!! It “is” Racist, Biggit, Homo Foabic, and probbly aginst The law tooo!!!!!

Whel, we helded a spatial meting “Of” “the” Stodent Soviet to give The Dizzney Corpse our infranggible Sapport!!!!!! Like in Snoe Wyte, we “say” TALL DWARFS THAY “ARE” PURFICT AND YIU WAS RITE TO MAIK THEMB AS BIGG AS ENNY BODDY ELSSE!!!!!!!!!! We aslo lyke Snoe Wyte being kinda Brown!!! And we “are” gladh yiu keep “whorking” to maik this heer Moovy even Woaker than “it” awlreddy Is!!!

Yiu shood maik the Handsum Prints gay!

And no moar Wicket Whitch!!!!! I CANN’OT STRESS THIS ENUOUGHH!!!!!! Whitches thay are Butiful “and” wyze!!!! Like Hillery!! Lyke Kamballa!!Amairacka it wood “Be” mutch Beter iff “it was” rooled by Whitches!!!!

‘Your Halloween Hot Line’ (2015)

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

141,900+ Empty Bucket Stock Photos, Pictures & Royalty-Free ...

Totally new! Guaranteed not to offend! Our Empty Bucket costume, ideal for Halloween. Available at any college where they know what’s good for ’em.

Halloween will be here before you know it–and you’ll want to be sure your Halloween costume offends NO ONE.

Your Halloween Hot Line

I don’t know if they’re still doing this, but some years ago, colleges and looniversities set up “Halloween Hot Lines”: you could call ’em up to find out whether your costume is “offensive.” The gibbons answering the phone calls would decide.

“Progressives” really hate the idea of people enjoying themselves–unless it’s at a public execution.

What ‘The’ H___?!?!

Posted By: leeduigon(patty)Posted On:

69 Empty Chairs Graduation Stock Photos, High-Res Pictures ...

[Publisher’s note: You wouldn’t believe the response we got yesterday when we forgot to run the weekly piece by Joe Collidge. It would be impossible to imagine a more radical number of comments. Anyway, here he is.]

Graduration “frum” Collidge it “is lyke” when a catterpiller it has A Metta-More-Fosis!! Oar when sumb boddy Reely Grate he becombs A godd!!!!!!!!!! (Like Pressadint O’Bomma!! And Pressadint Jobydin! Butt Pressadint O’Bomma he is “a” Bigger godd than Jobybdin!!)

Sumb “of” uss we shoed Up foar Graduration yeasterday And thay woodnt let us In!!!!!! Well, we whanted our Dipploamers!! We hased to caul the Poalice too errest The Kampus Kops!!! And thenn we fyned thay Nevver Botherd to Prinnt Up our dipploamers!!!!! in the frist plaice!

This heer stuph it wooont hapen ennymoar Wen Kamaller *She* is Pressadint!!!!! A lott of stuph woont hapen ennymoar!!!!! Evry One thay whil HAS To Go “to” Collidge and enny-boddy “hoo” tryze to Get Out “of” It,, Thay whil GO To JALE!!!!

I amb sure the Deen she tolled us that we auwll Get Dipploamers wen “we” Gradurate!!!!