Tag Archives: Joe Biden

Lies, Damned Lies, and Hopeless Whoppers

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“We choose truth over facts!” –Joe Biden, 2019

Lying has always been a part of politics; but once upon a time, lies had to be crafted skillfully enough to be believed. That’s the part of it that’s missing now.

When Joe Biden told a crowd at the Iowa State Fair, “We choose truth over facts,” we thought it was just another Biden gaffe. After all, he’s made a million of ’em.

But now I think we have to take him literally. He wasn’t kidding. Democrats really do dispense with facts, ignoring them or even badly denying things that everyone knows are true.

Last week the chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, Adam Schiff, stood up in front of the nation and read what he said was a transcript of a phone conversation between President Donald Trump and the president of Ukraine (https://thefederalist.com/2019/09/26/adam-schiff-makes-up-his-own-transcript-of-call-between-trump-and-ukraine-president/). The president has released a transcript of the call, but that’s not what Schiff read. What he read, he made up–fabricated every word of it himself, and attributed it to President Trump. When called to task for it during the very same hearing, Schiff took refuge in the excuse that it was–at least in part, he said–a parody. Only of course he didn’t introduce it as a parody. He introduced it as the president’s actual words.

This is what is commonly called a lie. Only it was a lie that couldn’t possibly survive, because the president had released the real transcript for everyone to see.

On the basis of this lie, Democrats have gone forward with impeachment. ‘Cause that, as ol’ Hambone Biden might say, is “truth over facts.”

Look for a steady diet of it from now on.


Biden Does It Again

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The other Democrats are even worse.

If idiotic statements were literature, Joe Biden would be Shakespeare.

This week the former vice president, now seeking the Democrat presidential nomination, said his proposed child tax credit would put “720 million women” back to work (https://www.foxnews.com/politics/biden-gaffe-put-720-million-women-in-workforce). Honestly, you could fill a very thick book with the loopy things he says.

Nevertheless, if he gets the nomination because the rest of the two dozen candidates are even sillier than he is, tens of millions of people will vote to give him custody of the nuclear missile launch codes. That is a very bad argument for having elections at all. I mean, what if he were to win? The Voter Fraud Party will do everything in its power, lawful or otherwise–mostly otherwise–to make sure he does.

P.S.–Just in case you went to public school, or currently attend a university, the population of the United States is around 330 million, half of whom are men. This esoteric information is cunningly concealed in the last census.

Joe Biden, Action Hero

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A friend of mine once told me he wanted to get into politics “because there it’s okay to talk about yourself a lot.”

Joe Biden, leading the pack of dervishes vying for the 2020 Democrat presidential nomination, has lived by those words. And then some. Brother, does this guy talk about himself–and the stories he tells!

A few days ago he “remembered” an incident from the 1960s in which he faced down and buffaloed four black gang members, led by a notorious character known as “Corn Pop” (https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2019/09/15/delaware-2017-joe-biden-recounts-wrapping-chain-gang-leader-corn-pop/). He says these guys were waiting for him with razors, but when he threatened to “wrap a chain” around Corn Pop’s head, they backed down.

Biden says this happened while he was “the only white lifeguard” at a public swimming pool in a black neighborhood–where, as one commenter on the story observed, they always have chains lying around in handy places, in case you need one to scare off some gang-bangers. Another commenter referred to the tale as “Biden’s Negro Summer Safari Adventure.” It doesn’t look like a lot of people are taking this seriously.

It’d be funny if we didn’t know that millions of dits will vote for this guy if he becomes the nominee. “Ooooh! Did you hear how he stood up to those gangstas? That’s the kind of tough leadership America needs!”

There are other details to this story that might be of interest, but for the sake of decency I have left them out. You can always get the whole thing by clicking the link.

Meanwhile, this is the palooka who said, “We choose truth over facts.”

With Democrats, facts are always optional.

Feeling Dumb? False Facts to the Rescue!

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After the fantastic success of the first three editions of False Facts–believe it or not, not a single reader wrote in to plead with me not to previewFalse Facts 4.0: not even one!–we were gratified to adopt presidential candidate and former Vice President Joe Biden as our company mascot. Let his words be our motto!

“We choose truth over facts.”

Tired of people thinking you’re just a poor dumb dope who doesn’t know anything? Do you wish you knew a lot of cool stuff that they don’t know? Wouldn’t it be great to have them all marveling at your erudition?

All you need is False Facts 4.0!

Here are just a few examples for you to practice with. When you see how impressed people are, you’ll want to buy the whole set.

Just remember: when you deliver a False Fact, stand up straight, speak boldly and authoritatively, and look that other person right in the idea, double-dog-daring him to challenge you. And okay, here we go.

*Yogurt was originally invented by the Vikings, who used it to treat nightmares in chickens.

*The Great Gatsby was originally written as an advertising gimmick for Lifebuoy Soap.

*The city of Glasgow, Scotland, does not actually exist. It was removed in 1968, but the maps have never been updated.

*TV coverage of the Battle of Fallen Timbers shortened the Civil War by turning the public against it.

*The Pestilent Dutch Elm Monkey of Central Africa can eat four times its own weight in shredded wheat each day.

Well, that’s enough to get you started. When you’re ready for the full set of False Facts 4.0, mosey on down to your local Rite-Aid with $410.89 in cash. Tell ’em Joe sent you.

Thank You, Don Quixote–er, I Mean Joe Biden

Who’s your favorite political kook? Which Democrat loon do you want to be our country’s next (and maybe last) president?

Don’t even start to make up your mind before you read and internalize this immortal quote from the oldest kook in the race, Joe Biden. Does he need to say anything else, to win our hearts and minds, and  claim his place in history?

Ready? Here it is–straight from the horse’s… er, mouth:

“We choose truth over facts.”

Didn’t Don Quixote once say that? Forget the musical, Man of La Mancha. In the novel as Cervantes wrote it, Don Quixote was as crazy as a bedbug and everything he touched, he destroyed.

We can’t elect Don Quixote president because he’s fictional–and anyway he’d be 500 years old. But Joe Biden’s almost as old, and he–oh, forsooth!–is real.

What Do Democrats Think of You?

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Well, Jolly Joe Biden has the answer to that question!

Trump supporters, and others who are not flaming liberals, are “the dregs of society,” Joe said the other day (https://www.inquisitr.com/5076092/trump-supporters-are-dregs-of-society-says-joe-biden-trump-jr-says-he-went-too-far/).

He was speaking to an audience of militant sodomites. Of course.

So, in addition to being “deplorables,” as Hillary Clinton labeled all non-Democrats, we are now also “the dregs of society.”

If you’re even thinking about voting for a Democrat in November–don’t!

These people hate you; and if they ever get back into power, you’ll know it.

‘The Vice President of Gomorrah’ (2014)

For those who have felt a pang of nostalgia for the Obama administration==



Bloomberg to Run–That Bloomberg?

New Hampshire Primary, Feb. 9, 2016: With Hillary Clinton getting body-slammed all over the primary mat by joke candidate Bernie Sanders, libs ‘n’ progs are starting to look around for a Plan B.

Should they take Joe Biden out of mothballs, and hope against hope that he can keep his mouth shut so no more gaffes fall out? Is Bill Ayers available?

Meanwhile, former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg is said to be contemplating, seriously, entering the race as a third-party candidate ( http://www.ft.com/cms/s/2/b6d1fc34-ce9f-11e5-831d-09f7778e7377.html#axzz3zhAxxN9w ). Since leaving office, the former mayor has been throwing his money all around the country, trying to disable the Second Amendment and launching his “Task Force on Climate Related Financial Disclosures” to make sure everybody does his bit to combat imaginary Global Warming.

Bloomberg is best known for forbidding New Yorkers to order a large soda, banning smoking from just about everywhere, and trying to control citizens’ intake of salt and caffeine. Despite these follies, he was a reasonably efficient mayor–compared to what they’ve got now, he was Solon the Wise–although the wheels kind of fell off late in his third term.

The interesting thing about Michael Bloomberg is his political philosophy, centered on using punitive taxation as a form of mass behavior modification. He is determined to tell you what to do, and tax your pants off if you won’t. It is said he used to keep a gorgeous crown in his bedroom closet and take it out and stand in front of the mirror, wearing it.

Bloomberg would scare me if I didn’t know that most of the country would find him about as appealing as a severed artery.

So I kind of hope he runs, just to siphon off votes from whoever the Democrats wind up nominating. I hear there’s some interest in Rosie O’Donnell.

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