Tag Archives: liberal lies

Wow Your Friends with These Astounding Facts!

Image result for images of speedy alka seltzer

“Unknowable” had a cool idea last night: just whip up any old thing that would stretch the credulity of a three-year-old, call it “settled science,” and presto–you’ve got a liberal column.

We can do this because liberal “facts” (e.g., “Socialism really works”) are not facts at all. Denying that there’s any truth, they can’t very well have facts. Instead, there’s only whatever helps them get their way–this they label “truth”–and whatever doesn’t. They will deny that they’re denying anything, if that’s what they think they need to do at the moment.

With this in mind, we present the following eye-popping false facts, which you can trot out for any conversation and impress your hearers with your wealth of esoteric knowledge.

*That little “Speedy Alka-Seltzer” in all those old commercials was played by Katharine Hepburn.

*The Hawaiian language was only invented in 1960, in support of Hawaii’s statehood movement. Prior to that, Hawaiians all spoke Welsh.

*The world’s largest insect is the Laotian Burping Mantis–four to five feet long and weighing, when full-grown, sixty to eighty pounds.

*In the Middle Ages it was very common for men of the nobility to propose marriage while standing on stilts.

*The gall bladder is the only organ in the human body that functions equally well when turned inside-out.

There you go–run a few of these up the flagpole and see who salutes ’em. If your hearers are prepared to accept these assertions as fact, you should be thinking about starting a career in higher education, advertising, or politics.


The University: Where Young Minds Go to Die

Hey, remember Janet Napolitano–Big Sis, former head of Homeland Security? Well, she’s now president of the University of California, and she’s come out with a big new list of things that no one will be allowed to say in any UCal schools ( http://nypost.com/2015/06/15/the-dont-you-dare-say-that-drive-for-campus-diversity/ ).

The stated goal is to produce “diversity” through enforced uniformity of thought.

For instance, Big Sis opposes what she calls “the myth of meritocracy,” so there will be a taboo against saying “I believe the most qualified person should get the job”–because that’s wrong, that’s bad, and it really means “People of color are given extra unfair benefits because of their race.”

Hmmm… You mean they aren’t? Never? What was Affirmative Action all about, then?

Big Sis has been handing out tracts with titles like “Tools: Recognizing Microaggressions and the Messages They Send.” You remember “microaggression,” right? ( https://leeduigon.com/2015/05/12/how-liberals-make-human-life-unliveable/ ) It’s virtually anything you say or do or think that some liberal doesn’t think you should be allowed to say or do or think. There is to be no microaggression throughout the UCal chain!

This era of history is an embarrassment. Authority figures, from the lowliest idiot teaching school to the most exalted fat-head in Washington, hand down ridiculous lies and promote crazy policies. They tell lies that even a simpleton should be able to see through (like “Bruce Jenner is now a woman”), and when they get caught lying, they just keep right on lying like nothing happened. If they’re left-wing liars, they know the nooze media will cover for them.

But as for everybody else, down there among the great unwashed…

You miserable peasants don’t even know you’re racists and homophobes and cissexists and whatever, everything that comes out of your mouths is microaggression, so just shut up!

They won’t be satisfied until they’re able to sew our mouths shut.


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