The Safest Vacation Ever!

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Were you just in the middle of packing for a vacation when you heard about the next COVID variant to come along and so we’d better just stay home and have another lockdown and obey all government mandates otherwise we’re all gonna die? Were you dying for a vacation, only to have this happen?

Well, until The Smartest People In The World can give us a germ-free environment, we’re going to have to do vacations differently. The paramount consideration in any vacation plan must be… safety! ‘Cause you never know just what kind of deadly germ might be laying for you on that mini-golf course, or waiting to descend on you as you sit down to eat at your favorite restaurant.

We at La Mumba Travel Agency understand your problem, we feel your pain! You need a vacation, but you need it to be a safe vacation. And that’s where we come in!

Now, thanks to our all-new Guranteed Safe Vacation Plan, you can visit your own linen closet and stay as long as you like! What could be safer than that? For a mere $500 per person, we’ll make all the arrangements. We’ll even tell you how to take out a few of the shelves so you can be more comfortable in there. No crowds, no need for social distancing–once you close the door, you won’t even need to wear your mask!

Satisfied customers are already dancing in the streets over this.

“For me it always used to be a cabin in the mountains, right on the lake. Who knew a stint in my own linen closet would be even better? And $75 cheaper, to boot!”

“The Jersey shore? Crawling with germs! But there’s no place safer than your linen closet!”

Names withheld to protect customers from new COVID variants.

My Newswithviews Column, May 13 (‘War of the Worlds’)

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The crisis of our age is a religious crisis. Don’t let anyone tell you different.

Here are two recent nooze stories that prove my point.

War of the Worlds

Water down Christianity on one hand, bully and terrorize the Christians on the other. This was always the way Red China did it. Now it’s turning into the way the United States and Canada do it.

The excuse this time is Because COVID.

Next time it’ll be something else.

‘Are These People Quite All There?’ (2016)

Global government personified!

Back in 2016 globalist schmendricks like John Kerry were already touting a “borderless world.” Which is what Climate Change and King COVID are all about, in case you hadn’t noticed.

Are These People Quite All There?

Please understand this. If you get rid of all the little governments that we know as “countries,” and replace them with one big huge government that will govern the entire world… the results will be horrific. Unimagineably bad.

But then, of course, it’ll be too late to do anything about it.

Anyone who wants to give that kind of power to the likes of John Kerry has got more than a few bats in his belfry.

Obedience Training for Adult Humans

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According to the ideology of hyper-humanism, government can create a risk-free, trouble-free, paradise of a world if only it’s given enough power–lots and lots and lots of power–and human beings obey that power… one way or another, heh-heh.

So it makes sense to teach adults a habit of obedience, as if they were toddlers or dogs. Adults get ideas above their station. They think they can live their lives without government telling them how to live. Tarnation! We’ll never get paradise if people don’t obey the government!

Now, according to a confidential source who is not to be relied on for a minute, the whole COVID-19 pandemic was designed as “a course in obedience” for the entire adult human population. The idea is, obey or the virus’ll kill ya. Obey no matter how big a hardship it is–lose your job, lose your business, lose Christmas with your family, wear a mask all the time, wear two masks, endure that jackanapes Fauci on your TV screen and pretend you believe him… All that hard and annoying stuff. Of course it’s not going to do you any good. The whole idea is to teach you to obey.

Just like if you were a dog.

So, sure, the nasty virus does really exist, they did take the trouble to brew it up in the lab and let it get loose, and heaven help you if you’re a patient in a nursing home and a COVID case comes in–

But like the man said, never let a good crisis go to waste!

After all, we believe that sinners and fools can create a government that’s neither sinful nor foolish… don’t we?

They Mean For Us to Lose Our Liberty

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My friend wrote something about “living in a self-governing republic.” I emailed him,”What makes you think we’re living in a self-governing republic?” “That’s a good question,” he replied.

The issue of our time is this: Do we keep our liberty, or lose it?

Democrats are betting that we lose it.

King COVID has given them hope that they’ll soon be able to wipe out our liberties altogether. China Joe came on the air this week to tell us what we’ll be “allowed to do”–“Allowed?” Did he said “allowed”?–once we’re all vaccinated. Somehow the idea of it being our choice to get vaccinated or not has simply fallen off the table. Will we still have a choice? And maybe, just maybe, if we’re good little peasants and do whatever the lord of the manor says, we might be allowed to have some kind of mini-get-togethers for the Fourth of July (

The CDC, he said, “will continue to provide official guidelines on what you can do in the workplace, places of worship, your friends,” etc. “What you can do.” The government will decide what you can do. “We will issue guidelines on what you can and cannot do when fully vaccinated.” Again, it goes without saying that you will not be able to choose not to be vaccinated.

Self-governing republic, eh?

But of course, once you’ve mastered the art of stealing elections, you can do anything you want. They’ll never be able to vote you out.

They’ve taken from us everything but our prayers.

Oh Lord our God, avenge us.

Seeing How Far They Can Go

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Plutarch tells us of a king of Sparta who enacted a lot of silly and exasperating laws–to teach his people, he explained, a habit of obedience.

Is this what’s being done to us?

No singing allowed! No cheering. Double face masks. Triple face masks! No Christmas, no Thanksgiving, no buying seeds or paint–no talking allowed in the supermarket! All of these and more have been imposed upon the people in what used to be called the Free World.


“Because COVID!” That’s the universal reason. Not that they’ve given up on Climate Change, but COVID has pulled far ahead of that.

But what if COVID’s not the reason? What if the whole idea is to prepare us for The Great Reset by teaching us a habit of unquestioning obedience?

What if they’re just trying to see how far they can go with provoking, exasperating, and confusing us? Keep going until they reach some undefined end point? If there even is an end.

Their assumption is that God can’t stop them.

But I think He can.

CDC Issues ‘Super Bowl Party Guidelines’

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Achtung! Verboten!

No human activity is too trivial for government to reach out to control!

Why anyone would bother to watch the Super Bowl, given pro football’s clearly expressed disdain for America and her people, is a mystery to me. But just in case you want to get together with family and friends to watch this bilge, the Center for Disease Control has issued “guidelines” for your Super Bowl party (

Wear your face masks indoors and outdoors, you silly little proles. And better than a family get-together would be a virtual gathering. And by all means “Avoid shouting, cheering loudly”–is there even such a thing as cheering softly?–“or singing.” No singing allowed!

Sure sounds like fun, eh?

Because COVID.

When are they going to pull down the Statue of Liberty?

CDC Now Calls for Double Face Masks

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Here you go–three face masks! Wanna try for four?

All right, all right already–hear now the nooze.

The CDC now wants us to wear two face masks, maybe even three, and has called for another “Mandate” forbidding travel on planes, buses, etc. unless you’ve got two face masks. Whatever (

You know what this is? It’s that creepy hyper-humanist ideology that insists that The Smartest People In The World can solve every problem, overcome every obstacle, as long as they’re given enough power to order everybody else’s lives. Yup–there’s no such thing as a crisis they can’t manage.

They’re treating King COVID as the deadliest disease in history, when obviously it isn’t, and we don’t know why. They also treat it as a problem they can solve, although so far all of their “solutions” are noteworthy for not working.

How long do we have to put up with this?